So Anxious in These Foolish Things
- July 13, 2023, 4:22 p.m.
- |
- Public
Nearly a week after being told I was going to have legal action taken against me for defamation or some sort, I have yet to hear from The Cutie Pie Company. I don’t know how long it takes to draw up a lawsuit, but I’m consulting with an employment attorney tomorrow for peace of mind.
I have been in a fairly constant state of anxiety over this for nearly a week now, and I need to forgive myself for making the mistake of sending that guy an email expressing my relief in resigning from that awful place. It was a HUGE, huge mistake. The dude was and is unhinged and because I didn’t follow him on Instagram (and now I’m watching him like a hawk to make sure he doesn’t do any MORE damage), I thought he’d be a normal human being and keep my thoughts to himself.
Yes, it’s MY fault.
Yes, it was a mistake.
But again, it’s not a lie for me to say I thought the job/situation was unhealthy for me. All of the email was MY truth. Was The Cutie Pie Company damaged for it? Hmmm? The dude has something like 2500 followers. It’s not like the shit went viral. And more people have certainly seen the Glassdoor reviews!
I’m just so sick.
I got reimbursed for my biz trip last month - just realized that I didn’t write about the dumb trip, did I? But I haven’t been paid for the first week of July (I only truly worked Thursday and Friday, but shouldn’t I get the paid holiday PLUS the two days that I worked??).
And I didn’t write about the threats from Chief Cutie - how she’d call up any future employer and bash me to them when I get my next job.
Hence, speaking to a lawyer tomorrow.
I’m just so freaking sick.
The kind of funny thing is, I’d had something delivered from Amazon to the Cutie Pie office a while back and I’d changed my primary address back, but AMZ is still sending my subscription items to the office. Today, some dog food was delivered. The office assistant sent me a text to tell me that they’d received my dog food!
Bless her, she’s going to take it home with her and I’m going to pick it up at her house this evening.
I’m not even allowed to pick something up at that office. Ugghgg.
I can’t wait to get this part of my life behind me. I can’t WAIT to be back to my Gingery Snappy self! She’s in there somewhere just waiting to come back out…hopefully in time for [Athena]’s visit next week. We both can use some JOY in our lives.
Love,
GS
Park Row Fallout ⋅ July 13, 2023
I'm going to keep professional commentary to a minimum- always good to get a lawyer familiar with the practice and the area unique to your situation. That said, someone else representing your words out of context is a pretty far stretch for defamation against you. But I remember when my father was fired from a company he helped build and they tried to use some backdoor "company secrets" loophole to keep him from ever getting another job.... business law is full of crappy, petty people but a good attorney will be worth the hiring.
Ginger Snap Park Row Fallout ⋅ July 13, 2023
Ugh. THIS is the stuff that's shitty. I did some networking today and I hope I can just move on from this part of my life gracefully. And I do know that Chief Cutie does not have a great reputation in this town, so there's that.
ninakir88 ⋅ July 13, 2023
it doenst sound like you actually violated your NDA though. you just talked to him about your experience.
Ginger Snap ninakir88 ⋅ July 13, 2023
Exactly. It wasn't anything disparaging about my boss - it simply stated that my position overlapped so hard with Chief Cutie's and it became very clear that it wasn't going to work like we'd all envisioned. And it just started feeling super unhealthy. And that I was ready to be comfortable in my working environment again.
I stated that nearly verbatim. No trade secrets or anything. Unfortunately, he threw mine in there with a bunch of other pretty nasty communications with others and mine was the only one that had my FREAKING NAME ON IT. Ugh.
ninakir88 Ginger Snap ⋅ July 13, 2023 (edited July 13, 2023)
Edited
why do the small companies have the terrible CEO's that threaten to sue everyone?
You should threaten to sue them for emotionally abusing you on the job! ha
the small company i worked for that wanted to sue me for writing them a bad review on glassdoor, did the following:
-made employees have a dresscode even though there was only like 3 or 4 of us at any given time in that office. but they were sexist. women couldn't wear jeans but men could.
-they put restrictions on bathrooms and how often you could go!
-they wanted a daily report of what you did each hour
-after i left, they put cameras in the office so they could see what you were doing on your computer 24/7 and so they could listen to your conversations (it was an open office)
-i went on a tradeshow and the man (the ceo was a team of a wife and husband) talked down to me and insulted me because i told him i was getting a little tired and just needed to sit for a sec (after 8 hours of standing). i quit immediately and booked a flight back on my own $$ to go home. it took them over a month to sent me my last paycheck.
after i wrote my review on glassdoor, they threatened to sue. it never went far though. i just shared my experience.
sooo yeah i get it lol. i still get nightmares about that experience ha
Ginger Snap ninakir88 ⋅ July 13, 2023
Ha, this sounds so weirdly familiar. So, so familiar.
Complicated Disaster ⋅ July 13, 2023
Maybe things are different in the US but in the UK an honestly held opinion can't be defamation. I'm always suspicious of companies that make you sign an NDA! xx
Ginger Snap Complicated Disaster ⋅ July 13, 2023
It's the same here. And I reviewed and reviewed my NDA - there is NO defamation clause in there. No defamation clause anywhere! I just need to get a new job and be over this.
Complicated Disaster ⋅ July 13, 2023
Also, *hugs* <3 xx
Ginger Snap Complicated Disaster ⋅ July 13, 2023
And thank you for the hugs. I needed them.
Complicated Disaster Ginger Snap ⋅ July 13, 2023
I've always got time for you 😊😊 xx
simple mind ⋅ July 13, 2023
This all sounds so horrible. But it also sounds like there is no real case to be made against you - just an unhinged boss lashing out at anyone she can blame during her death spiral.
colder ⋅ July 13, 2023
It sounds like they don't have a leg to stand on legally, but that doesn't mean they can't cause you trouble and defame you. Ugh!
CharminglyNeurotic ⋅ July 13, 2023
I think it's going to be fine. But you can't get a reference from them so I suspect you are going to have to figure out how to remove it from your resume because you don't want have to address this at future interviews, but also can't lie and say you never worked there. I guess you could say the truth: You worked there a short while and quite because it wasn't a good fit, but then the future employer will have the firm name and could potentially reach out. Perhaps this is a good sign to leave your new city and go elsewhere so no one will even know Cutie Pie co at all and there will be no way anyone will know of it, your role there, or any drama. I think the Universe really has a way of making things work out for the best - you really shouldn't have had to do a month more there. Even two weeks, altho profesh courtesy, was pushing it. Now you are out immediately and don't have to worry about getting calls from Cutie CEO, etc. It's done, in the rearview mirror. I hate when relationships end abruptly but honestly all goodbye should be sudden is really for the best.
MightyZeus ⋅ July 13, 2023 (edited July 13, 2023)
Edited
Everyone in the world is an armchair lawyer... but i've been laid off enough times and have also been sued a few times so I feel i'm in a position to provide some feedback. Though, as other noters said, seek professional legal advice. Don't underestimate the value of "legal aid". They're good and charge on a sliding scale, if at all.
Anyways, for what it's worth... defamation is any FALSE information that damages a person or company's reputation. If nothing you said was false, and if the company has a history of bad reviews, then it's likely a scare tactic by the company to get you to kowtow to them, or to get you to do something like write a glowing review on glassdoor. I would breathe a little easier, but still remain diligent.
Also - speaking of defamation - "she’d call up any future employer and bash me to them when I get my next job" sounds like a clear case of either slander or libel... both of which are case of a defamation suit against her!
Wishing you luck.
Sugar Magnolia ⋅ July 13, 2023
I think you will be able to relax a little bit after speaking to your attorney tomorrow. Still too much stress on your plate but you can stop fretting about the legal bs. Hugs
Ginger Snap Sugar Magnolia ⋅ July 14, 2023
I hope so. Thank you for the hugs. xo
Nash ⋅ July 13, 2023
I don't know what they would sue you about but I don't know what you said. If you simply stated an opinion, "company X sucks," you are in the clear. Where you could be held liable is if you made an intentionally false statement with intent to harm. "Cutie Pie stole my purse," for example. Even then in most states CP would have to prove real damage and malice. I doubt you have a lot to worry about. In fact, given the work environment it is likely you who has the stronger case. She can bash you all she wants, you have a powerful resume and lots of friends in the business it sounds to me.
Ginger Snap Nash ⋅ July 14, 2023
I said that my job overlapped with Chief Cutie and that it was starting to feel unhealthy and that I couldn't wait to be in a place where I felt comfortable in my working environment again. Then HE said that he was happy for me and that we're all set up for failure there and that it's sad.
I just hate that it came to this. I probably do have a stronger case with her threat at this point. You guys are right.
Jinn ⋅ July 14, 2023
Hugs! If she made threats against you ; ask that lawyer about suing her for harassment , also age discrimination :-) ( since she made your position so difficult ) .
pandora ⋅ July 19, 2023
It's really unfair that he dragged you into it. I'm so sorry.
Serin ⋅ July 25, 2023
I'm glad you have people helping you (re shipments).
And you're right to be careful, but the flipside is that some people are quick to threaten lawsuits because threats are cheap and legal stuff is scary so it's a big gun. But actually suing is more expensive. Recognizing that she's nutty, I'm going to hope it's just talk.