Rake At The Gates Of Hell
Suffice to say I'm constantly surprised I'm still alive, what with the drugs, the alcohol, the random accidents, the random psychos, the bad food, the worse weather, the overzealous cops, the screwball dog, and the crushing realisation that boredom is far more preferable to death.
Mother's eyes are sparkling diamonds, still the moon shows no light. This rose is withered, may God deliver the rake at the gates of hell tonight.
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Sharknado in Down and Out in Dorset
I just binged the whole series. These films encapsulate the intellectual drive for human interaction and emotion. The main character’s fight against the fascist shark regime, a clear allegory fo...
Vidya in Down and Out in Dorset
Been playing a lot of videogames lately, mainly on my 3DS. Yesterday I bought Dragon Quest VIII. So far I’m enjoying it a Hell of a lot more than VII, which wasn’t a bad game as such, I just kind...
Listen and Believe in Down and Out in Dorset
A lovely sentiment. However, something the people who mention this fail to realise is that your gender doesn’t exclude you from being a liar. Case well and truly in point. There are actual victi...
OD reboot to be a paid service from day one in Down and Out in Dorset
The following represent my thoughts on the matter. Naw but seriously, if you give Bruce your money you’re a fucking numbskull. EDIT Bruce, when people still sign up like the idiots they ar...
Hardcore shit! in Down and Out in Dorset
In America, gangs have names like the Bloods. In the UK, we have gangs called the Burger Bar Boys. This should tell you all you need to know about UK street crime.
It's official... in Down and Out in Dorset
… Donald Trump doesn’t give a fuck about America.
Life advice in Down and Out in Dorset
A short motivational video for the perpetually unmotivated.
Apoceclipse in Down and Out in Dorset
Apparently some idiots believe that the eclipse was “American”. That isn’t how it works you unbelievable twatfucks.
Metalocalypse in Down and Out in Dorset
Dethklok are dead, the show is no more, and Brendon Small doesn’t even own the rights to his own characters. All is lost! But wait. No it’s not, because he’s got together with Gene Hoglan and Co...
SmileBASIC in Down and Out in Dorset
A BASIC programming tool set for the 3DS? Intriguing. And only eight quid a pop, too, which frankly puts RPG Maker Fes to shame. I think I’ll have some fun with this. I’m waiting on Metroid Samu...
OD bollocks in Down and Out in Dorset
I’m hearing rumours that Bruce the Diarymaster is thinking of giving OpenDiary a comeback. Ah. Aha. Ahahahahahaha. This should be good for a laugh.
Things about me in Down and Out in Dorset
I’m starting to think maybe I should tell you a little about my thought processes, but I’m hungover and to be honest I really can’t be bothered, so here is some light reading.
Free speech is bad in Down and Out in Dorset
Look, I understand that racism and bigotry should be stamped out. I’m all for that. But when a rally called “Free Speech Rally” is considered a bad thing, I have to ask whether or not you’re doi...
Stupid, stupid goddamn idiots in Down and Out in Dorset
Well, once again a news story broke that made me question the point of the human race. These morons saw a beached baby dolphin and instead of calling the authorities to help it back into the wate...
The tiny handed elephant in the room in Down and Out in Dorset
Okay, let’s talk about Donald Trump. He’s a schmuck. A bad-toupee-wearing dour faced mental pygmy who disgusted me long before he won America’s Got Racism the presidency. He described the Klan ...
Neo-Nazi shitcunts in Down and Out in Dorset
I can’t believe Neo Nazis are making a comeback. Just when I thought we’d moved on from that embarrassing period of human history, these chinless fucks come crawling back out of the woodwork. Fol...
Geyser in Down and Out in Dorset
I got the bridge of my nose pierced yesterday. I made the mistake of having a JD or three beforehand, and as such it pissed blood for about four hours. It actually hurt like a bastard, too, so no...
[Title] in Down and Out in Dorset
It’s not easy to give up smoking. I should know, I’ve never done it. As I sit here in my home, which is made of canvas, candle aglow and cigarette hanging out of the corner of my mouth, it occurs...
