Timmy™ ⋅ 42 ⋅
My name is Timmy™, formerly authorcode C104458 on OD. (Successor to A624512) Jersey born and raised, currently living in an OK state. I like cheese, feminism, bad puns, pegging, and Star Trek. Some entries are filtered. Don't be shy. I only bite if we have a safeword in place.
How could the world go back to the way it was when so much bad had happened? But in the end, it's only a passing thing, this shadow. Even darkness must pass. A new day will come. And when the sun shines it will shine out the clearer.
Entries 998
Page 26 of 40
Cardboard. in The Napkin.
And another thing I missed the assembly on: spaghetti. I don’t know how to eat it. I try the twirl method, and I either get too much or too little. I’ve also been told it’s rude to bite and drop ...
Good Morning. in The Napkin.
I missed the assembly on body wash. I’m a life-long bar user, and am always baffled by how one operates body wash. It’s.. lather in a tube? But I use the bar via scrubbing my Timmyparts to bu...
A Female in the Weiner Room. in The Napkin.
There was a “female cleaning” sign affixed near the men’s locker room. I suppose there are some who would be all OH NOEZ, A GIRL SAW MY WEINER*, but my first thoughts were this: A: I’d rather h...
Mood, stop that. in Whey and Sonic Screwdrivers.
I’m part-Scientist, so I have a theory on why I was so depressed yesterday and this morning. Initially, I thought it was because yesterday was a Planned Rest Day™. (You know, to avoid lifting t...
Gym Nuances. in The Napkin.
I tend to feel bad when someone asks me if they can have the squat rack after me, or asks how many sets I have left. I got to the gym around 7:30, entirely so I could hog the squat rack for half...
Overheard by the Squat Rack. in The Napkin.
Girl #1: "Fucking boobsweat." Girl #2: "I know, right?" Girl #1 to Guy in their trio: "Sorry yours aren't big enough." I love people who have frank discussions in public. Or Francene discuss...
I grunt at you. in The Napkin.
While muted, I spied this ad while I was treadmilling. (Crunch Fitness, if you must know.) Once again, this feels like someone making fun of Planet Fitness. It wouldn’t take that much to take ...
Flaming Liberals Unite. in The Napkin.
When you discover your new shrink has basically the same political stances as you do. Right down to being able to make the “nominate Ted Cruz to SCOTUS and you’ll have eight vacancies” joke and ...
Anti-Depressant Hypoxia. in Whey and Sonic Screwdrivers.
Whenever someone suggests yoga to deal with depression, I know immediately they have absolutely no fucking idea what they’re talking about. No secret I’m a gymrat. Obviously I feel it helps me d...
Bernie "The Birdie" Balboa. in Whey and Sonic Screwdrivers.
Okay, seriously media that I couldn’t avoid because it was cardio day at the gym? HILLARY HAS NOT CLINCHED THE NOMINATION. She has 2184 pledged delegates, with 2382 needed to win. She has the ...
Kira says hi. in The Napkin.
Okay, maybe she doesn’t. But I can say hi!
Melvin-Free Wares. in Whey and Sonic Screwdrivers.
We all know the rule in the gym about not staring at people. Heck, since I’m attracted to girls, more often I find myself idly watching guys lift. I have this bizarre logic that since I’m a dud...
Anuswater. in Whey and Sonic Screwdrivers.
I used to not really understand people who would shower after being in a pool. It’s a pool. It’s water. Even the little chlorine now and then isn’t a huge deal. And even if it’s dirty water, ...
Fruity Puns. in The Napkin.
Remembering a time when I would carry apples in my coat pockets so I could interject into a lull in conversation, “hows about dem apples?” And the period of time when I used to carry bananas in m...
Active and Passive Entertainment. in Whey and Sonic Screwdrivers.
I like balance. At times, I seem to favor way too much active entertainment, or too much passive entertainment. Sometimes I’ll be so into a game like Everquest2 that I will have to specifically ...
On Gender. in The Napkin.
If gender traits were innate, we wouldn’t need to indoctrinate them. Paraphrased from: Source
On Voluntary Hygiene. in The Napkin.
Winter: I just showered two days ago and I swear I still smell fine. Do I reeeally need to? Summer: I just took my third cold shower of the day, and you can’t stop me from taking a fourth.
Dripping in the Squat Rack. in Whey and Sonic Screwdrivers.
I feel like I could fuck a dozen bitches and eat a ten kilogram steak. Holy shit, what a difference when I warm up properly. I know I joke about getting older, but I’LL HAPPEN TO YOUUUUU. :: ...
Domino's Pan Pepperoni Pizza with Extra Cheese. in The Napkin.
Look at this pizza. Look at it. It was glorious and delicious. Since you are what you eat, this is a selfie. And since I am part pizza, I am glorious and delicious.
An OD/PB Survey. in The Napkin.
From: Gilraent What does your online diary name mean, and why did you pick it? My name is Timmy, and I am very Timmy™. When did you first get an online diary? November 29, 2001. I can’t believe...
On PPL. Or PLPH, whatever. in Whey and Sonic Screwdrivers.
This Pull/Legs/Push/Heart/repeat routine that I’ve designed for myself may be just the right balance. :: fistpump :: There’s a day between when I use the shoulder joint, and a day between when I...
Inane Quotient. in The Napkin.
Based on my propensity for subjecting friends with a deluge of ridiculous texts in the morning, I’d say my brain is way more active in the morning. As well, despite how inane I can be, I find it ...
The Greeting. in The Napkin.
On my way out of the gym, a girl working there commented, “Hey, you’re early today.” My initial response: “I’m getting old.” Ha ha. I woke up around 4 AM, peed, and had a nice relaxing hour in ...
It's not just veggies, anymore. in The Napkin.
Note to self: While strawberries are rad, tossing in a banana into your broccoli/carrot/kale smoothie totally takes the edge off the bitterness, and helps with the consistency. I WILL CONSUME M...
QWERTY Power. in The Napkin.
For better or for worse, I seem to have gotten into the habit of viewing the Box of Prose on my phone. Something about physically sitting at my computer with the purpose to write is an iota stres...
