Hey. The craziest thing just happened to me. I completely lost it. I finally snapped. I was going to the casino earlier with a friend. My truck got there okay, but when I was heading home, my truck wouldn’t start. I got it going after about 15 minutes. But it ran like shit the whole way home. It smoothed out at the end of the ride and now its not throwing any codes which has me worried because if there is no codes, what caused the rough ride?
I feel like everything is just against me. That truck is the last thing of us. The last bit of our empire that crashed so hard. I would be destroyed if I had to get rid of it. My Nana is dying. I feel guilty because she only has 3-6 months to live and I never really talk to her. But she always wishes me a Happy Birthday every year. So it kinda sucks right now.
I sat in my garage and worked on my new painting for a while but I was just getting a headache. I heard this song by Sody called ‘Maybe It Was Me’. I saw the music video.........she looks just like you. I went into a full blown panic attack. It was like you were her. I swear like....spitting image of this girl. It got me in the feels pretty quick. I cried. Hard. Harder than I ever had. And I mean that with no exaggeration. That scares me…because I think that means I wont feel for you anymore.
I swear I will hold on and never let go…like Jack and Rose. I wish good things for you babe. And you’re still my favorite person. I hope that somewhere deep down in your heart, I’m still yours.
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