Death Happens. in It's Art, You Wouldn't Understand

Yesterday I was bleeding like a stuffed hog. Today I just have blinding back pain and a bloated belly. I think I put on 6 pounds? Well, whatever, it’s my 3rd day and the good news is by time school starts I should be done. I’m just over planning my days, months and life around my period. I got some pills from the doctor three months ago when I pulled a chest muscle during one of my workouts. I’ve been using them to curb the pain a bit. I like it a lot better than the drug store stuff and wonder why they don’t sell these types of pills over the counter.

I mean, I know why, but the whole thing makes me angry anyway.

I was supposed to work GrubHub to help pay for my books but my cramps got in the way. A whole weekend shot. It’s my fault. I knew school was going to be expensive and I should have been working consistently before now. So I deserve this really. I made some money off my online store but not enough and it won’t be here in time.

Once I’m well again, I’m going to work every day. I need money for my shop, and school, clothes and just savings. How did I let it get so bad?

My controller is in the shop for about 2 weeks, maybe less? I’ll use this as a deadline to get my ass in gear again. I work better with some type of pressure looming over my head. I’ll make a budget and get to it.

In other news, my last grandfather died. Well, not my last but the last one I acknowledge. I don’t feel sad or anything. In all my years of knowing T I’ve only spoken maybe 15 words to him.

I won’t be going to the funeral or anything like that. My mom doesn’t want to talk about her relationship to him all that much. I feel like she’s hiding something but I’m going to leave it alone and just spectate.

I really want to use my already filled credit card to buy a new skirt off Amazon, its only 12 bucks but Chu will have fit if he finds out....Ugh.

I’m gonna get it.