So i have to write this here before i say it to her face. And lets be clear the only reason why i aint saying it to her face is because i need a place to live so im going to write her here.. Safe place and it gets it off my chest.
So here it goes: (im not using real names)
Dear Jane,
I need to get this off of my chest. And its piling up and i think this all has been a big part of my relapse into my mdd.
Though i am grateful you have allowed me to move in with you until i can get what little of a life i have together again after i kept messing it up time after time. Because you didn’t have to. So thank you.
But (i know the but came, hate using it because its almost like forget everything i just said heres what i really mean to say. But i do mean the stuff before the but) i do not like to be used or taking advantage of. We came to the agreement that i would gove you my car payment money and youd put it on my car for me. Well i gave the money two weeks ago and you still havent done it. So you spent it. You screwed me over for your own gain. What kind of a sister does that. And you can not say i havent been helping you out as i have. Ive given you 200 dollars since youve started asking for help. And i by no means Am mad or anything About helping you. You did let me stay worth you. But that doesnt mean you have the right to do what you did to me. I now have to pay the price for this. You gained off of my loss and now i habe to scramble to get back ahead. How fair is that?
So yes im mad, disappointed as i have the right to. And yes i know telling your two daughters would get back to you. Thats why i told them. And if course more excuses. Why can’t the excuses leave amd the truth come out?
I almost should habe known better as you have done this type of stuff before. To out mother and the church you worked for. But i thought you had grown a lil but i guess not.
And you sit there and try to make me be the bad guy. But when in reality it was you. Another disappointment. Are you ever going to grow up?
Well anyways i just wanted to get this all off my chest.
Me.
I feel better i just wish i could say all this to her.
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