Breakup & Dependant in ❅journal 2019❅
- July 11, 2019, 9:59 a.m.
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- Public
So, my girlfriend broke up with me. I shouldn’t have gotten so attached, so excited to have someone who truly loved me for me.
I was angry, really really angry. She led me on for a week knowing she didn’t love me. Said she wanted to get married and wanted a family together. She didn’t even love girls. My heart was ripped into shreds, I started shaking and i never got out of bed the rest of the night. I just cried until it sort of stopped hurting, like anyone would in my place.
So I ran to my best friend who happened to be my ex and i clung to him. I was so happy, he loves me so he won’t get sick of me right? I won’t be seen as dependant or clingy, not with him. He won’t tell me to back off.
I was so wrong. So very wrong.
‘Listen, I’m here for you alright but don’t depend on me a lot. I mean I don’t mind it but I feel like you need someone to love in your life so you can focus on stuff.’
It hurt seeing that last night, from the boy i only felt safe with. To throw me away like that, I stared at it in shock my heart beating harder and harder. Then I went to sleep, feeling so heart broken i didn’t even want to speak.
NotAGhostWriter ⋅ July 11, 2019
If he didn't want the responsibility of being your go to then he should have been man enough to not allow it in the first place. I hope that you are able to find peace and can move on from both situations. ((hug))
HoniBunnyCakey NotAGhostWriter ⋅ July 11, 2019
((hugs back)) thanks, it's all very confusing, he just recently said I can move out of my bad home situation to stay with him but now this makes me doubt his words :( time will tell ig
NotAGhostWriter HoniBunnyCakey ⋅ July 11, 2019
I had a psychic once tell me, "Been there, done that. Leave the past in the past." I don't know that moving in with him would be the best move, anyway. I don't know him but from what he said in your post, it doesn't seem like it would be the best situation.