Lost in Depression

I’m trying is all I can ever say , I feel like giving up , i think about more than I did before and this time I’m scared I may not be strong enough to keep going , I don’t say anything because nobody understands me or get where I’m coming from . I will never get why people care about how people look , why they feel the need to be so judgemental as if we don’t see ourselves in the mirror when we find the courage to do so , I hate hearing about my flaws that I know I have like why tf are they always reming me instead of telling me if I’m still okay prior of wanting to and overdosing it’s like you go get help and come back to people thinking you are back to normal like your totally fine , why don’t people see or put themselves in my shoes for a while and see how I really feel , I feel lost , I’m trying so hard to find myself but I’m slowly getting tired and giving up