don't tempt me in 2018

4:15pm

I’m sitting in the car waiting and I figured I might as well start an entry and see where it goes. I keep meaning to write but I’m not in front of a computer every day any more. With this new tiny computer on my phone I hardly pull the laptop out at home. This screen is still too little to write comfortably although I’m using it now because I’ve got nothing better to do. Starting this might mean I’ll post something sooner. We’ll see. I’m only typing in notes since logging in and out is a pain. I don’t expect anyone to go scrolling through my phone any time soon but I’m still paranoid about keeping PB open.

The next couple of weeks will be a little crazy. Mostly in a good way! The rest of this week will be spent shopping and working. Making sure I get everything done before I leave town. I don’t want to miss any bills or client’s stuff. I’m also trying to pick up any last minute necessities I might need on my trips. Yes, that’s multiple trips! 😁 I’m going to spend a few days in Laughlin and then I’ll be home for like an afternoon before heading to Hawaii!!

I’m excited but a little nervous/hesitant. Travelling is always a bit nerve wracking. Like am I going to make it? Will we hit traffic or miss the flight? I’ve been paranoid about that since I got stuck in Seattle for an entire day. Hah. I’d rather be two hours early and waiting than do that again. We’re still trying to figure out parking, drivers, etc but it’ll work out. I’m going to try to relax and just enjoy every minute of it. For some reason I’m more worried about Laughlin I guess because it’s more crowded and tight quarters. Plus Hawaii includes 10 of us so less pressure to entertain and/or be “on” all the time. I enjoy life so much more when I can sit back and just soak it all in.

Speaking of kicking back: we’re going back to the beach for another taco Tuesday tomorrow! We realized we won’t be able to go for a few weeks so we decided we better go again tomorrow.

I had to go back just now and read how much I’ve written about the Sheriff in the last couple of weeks. Because he’s involved in all this now. I mentioned in the last entry that I’d sent that picture from last Tuesday to him. Then he replied asking if I was on vacation and where I went. I told him I was still around I’d just gone to [beach town] to enjoy my first Tuesday off. I know we’ve talked about that place before but I don’t know if he remembers.

He replied the next day I think and asked what I was doing in that town. Then he goes, “that’s kinda weird though…I checked, double checked, and RECHECKED my phone for a missed call or voicemail from you inviting me but nope…” He went on to say he found nothing at all not even a text or email, and that he could have joined me because he doesn’t typically work on Tuesdays. The rest of the email was about the voicemail he received and how he didn’t need copies and he hoped I had a great day.

I was totally surprised to read that though! I didn’t expect him to respond with any thing other than maybe asking what I was doing around that town. I’m definitely trying not to read too much into it! Y’all know me, so this isn’t a particularly easy task, but I’m trying! It was just unexpected. He was basically asking me to invite him, or inviting himself along. haha.

I saw that message before I went to bed and I wasn’t ready to sleep yet so I ended up replying right then and there. Making jokes about his voicemail and I being best friends and calling it when I need to talk. I told him not to tempt me or I’d end up inviting him and he’d probably stand me up saying he got busy then I’d have to call vm to complain. haha. I’m so funny right? =]

In a non-surprising update he never responded to that message. I think I figured out his thing! Like he’ll say something semi-flirtatious, or personal, and I’ll continue whatever it is in my response, and then he panics or something and won’t reply again. It’s happened more than once. It’s quite the trend if you look back on all the messages. I mean, I don’t think he actually panics but that’s what it seems like. As if he looks back on it and is like, “oh shit, took it too far. Let’s rewind and gain some space.” ha. I don’t even know.

Anyway, over the weekend after we’d decided to go back to tacos tomorrow, I started debating whether or not I should invite him. Yes, I’m crazy. I can’t help myself. haha. And he should keep his mouth closed and not suggest these things to me. I like to call people out!

I don’t think I mentioned it but as I was texting the client last Tuesday he was basically inviting himself to join me. I seriously considered it. I think if I’d said “come” he definitely would have. He sounded like he really wanted to even after I mentioned being with a bunch of old ladies. hah. I couldn’t do it though. I kept thinking about how he wouldn’t fit in with that group. We were mostly speaking Spanish and he only knows the bad words. ;) And I’d feel like I had to entertain him. He couldn’t just mix into the group and join the overall conversation. I don’t feel like I have enough to say to him to keep the convo going. Even when he’s stopped by the office I find myself running through topics in my head so the next lull won’t feel awkward. Normally I don’t mind silence but I don’t want it to be weird.

The thing is though, that while I was considering the invite to him, I was actually thinking about how the Sheriff would totally fit in. He knows plenty of Spanish, he’s a little bit older, my mom already enjoys him and they’ve hardly spoken. ha. Plus we’ve always had so much to say that I’m not worried about entertaining. The fact that I was thinking about all this became really interesting when he joked about being invited a couple days later.

So, long story semi-short, I ended up sending an email Saturday night inviting him to tomorrow. Eek! I was going to procrastinate a little longer but he doesn’t exactly live here so I had to give him time to plan if he wants to drive down.

Do I actually think he’ll come? No. He didn’t even respond to the invite. But I pretty much wrote it with the idea of not needing a reply. I told him what day, where I’d be, and what time. I mentioned he was welcome to join and to consider it his official invitation so he could no longer say I never invited him. I warned him about it usually being me and a bunch of older ladies. And I said that it was OK if he couldn’t make it, I’d be there regardless, and I wouldn’t actually give him a hard time about it.

I’m kinda expecting a message from him tonight, or tomorrow morning, saying something like hi sweetie, I’m not gonna make it, but thanks for inviting me. I’m a little hesitant to even check my messages. I like it better if I just don’t know whether he’ll show or not. Keeping the hope alive I guess? hah. Even though expectations are low and I really don’t think he will - message or not.

It’s not like he’s right around the corner. The dude’s not gonna drive all that way. It’s gotta be about 150 miles! I mean, I drive all over the place so that doesn’t seem like a big deal, but most people aren’t like us. Plus it’s just for drinks. He didn’t even come down for the work thing. I just don’t see why he’d show for something as simple as this.

Ok, obviously I know I’m awesome so that would be totally worth it, but it’s still a lot. =P I had to call him out though! Teach him not to say these things to me anymore.

Just checked messages; still nothing. Still early. Let’s not get our hopes up for a surprise Rose! Geez!

Updates to follow tomorrow either way.

rose.
10:14pm

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Almost 2pm and still no message. I’m surprised. Not getting my hopes up though. He probably didn’t even see it. He’s disappeared into the wilderness again I’m sure. It’s not like he’s just going to show up without getting in touch. He’s not that crazy I’m the crazy one 😝

Last updated May 01, 2018