Ancient Names (part 1) in Every day scata
- Jan. 28, 2018, 5:11 p.m.
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- Public
Lord Huron
6:37 am
Just got up and my shower done. Now sipping on my first cuppa coffee for the day. I’m here because I’m not ready to face the “world” yet.
I don’t know if any of you belong to the “OD Peeps” group on facebook but it was hysterical yesterday. There was this one person who obviously has no memory of how we all got fucked over by Bruce. Pam tried battling out with her and got nowhere. I posted my own thoughts on the deal and she commented on my post. Every comment I gave back was dripping with sarcasm and she just didn’t get it! lol I finally gave up because there is something wrong with that woman. Or maybe it’s Bruce pretending to be some batty lady lol I wouldn’t put it past him.
After the fiasco “over there” yesterday, I’m glad that I plan on writing here, then just posting the same entry over there. I may do the writing prompts over there, though. Just because this is where I can be me. I used to be able to be me at OD but if I ever get comfortable sitting at that table again it will take a long time.
Besides, 99% of my OD friends are now my PB friends, plus I’ve made a lot of new cool friends here. And of course I’m still in touch with almost all of my favorites from OD on facebook. We all did the mad scramble to get emails and facebook info and mailing addresses.
Anyhoo. Time for me to bitch about my wrist.
I don’t know what I’ve done, but it feels just about as bad as it did when I first broke it. oooh! man! I just flexed it and it POPPED! oh that feels a little better! ::sighs in relief::
Do you guys think I’ll actually finish catching up with all of you today? I tried super hard but just didn’t make it. I don’t think I’m doing anything after work. I’ll put on some music and see how far behind I am when I get home.
Time for more coffee.
3:56 pm
Hectic at work today. Well, I mean, it doesn’t take me long to turn over a room anymore, but the guests were slobs this weekend. And wasteful. I threw out a large pizza with just one piece missing. smh Why didn’t they take it with them? Why waste it? ::sigh:: If I was a dare devil I would have taken it home. hmph maybe next time lol
While making the bed in the King room my wrist started screaming, which made me yell out loud. I’m really glad that Chef Michael had left because I yelled pretty damn loud. After that happened I slowed to a snails pace because of the pain. That really sucked because I was going to use that half hour that I was ahead by to catch up on laundry.
Such is life.
I’m horrible, though. For me, Pain = an excuse to buy beer. So I bought beer. I need to fucking stop doing that. I just don’t know how. Yes, I know. Meetings blah blah. Um. No. They don’t work for me. Again, if I had proper pain management I wouldn’t drink. If weed was legal I seriously wouldn’t drink. I never mingled the two together often, and when I did I felt like utter shit.
I better stop typing without the brace on. It’s really starting to hurt.
See ya.
Teflon Superhero ⋅ January 28, 2018
I'm not leaving this note to say 'you have a problem so here is a solution' I'm just leaving it because you said the 'meetings' part and that it didn't work for you.
I know AA has a very religious aspect to it that turns a lot of people off or keeps them away from it, and I had a friend refuse AA because of that alone since he is an Athiest. He eventually found Smart, and it's a mix of behavioral therapy, mindfulness, and support. You can see if they have any meetings in your area or do online meetings in groups.
If you ever feel you might need it, https://www.smartrecovery.org/ That's the website.
I never registered since I'm far out on my 'recovery' and don't need active help, but I pop in time to time to see what articles are up. Some are written to help you recognize unhelpful thinking habits that can turn your mood and ultimately lead you to drinking. Tips how to avoid failing during the holidays or high stress environments, stuff like that. And for those you don't have to register. If you register you can use the forums and set up online meetings and stuff like that.
Just throwing it out there if you need another avenue to look into since the ones brought up normally usually aren't a good cup of tea for most.
Gilraent Teflon Superhero ⋅ January 28, 2018
hey! Thanks! I'ma going to bookmark that for tomorrow when I have a brain :)
You're awesome.
Teflon Superhero Gilraent ⋅ January 28, 2018
No problem. he was in a really bad way and actually got picked up on federal charges due to everything he got into and was let out after a few years. He still seemed bitter and angry and wouldn't get help. he disappeared again for over a year so I assumed the worst (we both worked together and both left our job around the same time so I didn't have a way to keep up with him other than facebook).
He popped back up and his temperment, mood, everything has done a 180 so I asked him if he got help and he told me he did and sent me there. He advocates for it now and tries to help people if they refuse AA since that's all they know exists. I've been trying to let people know too if they mention that they don't want to do AA or NA or feel like there's no options for them.
And still, it may not turn out to be your cup of tea, but I know it helped him tremendously take control of himself and that's what he needed and not a 12 step program. But if it doesn't work for you, or isn't what you're looking for, just know there's a lot more options now than there were if you ever do need them :)
Gilraent Teflon Superhero ⋅ January 28, 2018
I also sent the link to my friends mom (who is also my friend) who is having some very serious issues that are just not being treated properly. I, of course brought up the AA/NA meetings at the hospital, but she is a lot like me. I don't think it would work if she was willing to go.
In fact, I hope to hear back from her mom some time tonight. I'm worried. haven't heard how the day went... yada yada. I don't want to put myself too far into their lives, but I do want to be there to help.
Thank you, Shane. Mean it :)
Gilraent Teflon Superhero ⋅ January 28, 2018
Got word from Momma D. She and J are discussing what I've shared with them, includint the Smart thing.
I'm hoping that J will reach out to me. You know how it is when you're dealing with parents. There are just some things you cannot tell them for a multitude of reasons. Momma D is a big lovable ball of anxiety. over reacts to everything. Because I'm... well kind of out of the situation (yet a tiny bit mixed in) and I have the medical knowledge and the personal knowledge of living with mental illness, maybe J will talk to me like she used to. Again, I don't want to push and make her shut down. I just want her to know I'm there.
Because of everything in her life, she is no longer on social media, so lol omg i'll actually have to talk on the phone or go out for coffee!!!
Going out for coffee sounds pretty damn good, though.
Teflon Superhero Gilraent ⋅ January 28, 2018
Hey yeah I understand. I know every time it was approached with me, no matter how much I was at my "I have to stop" point that I got defensive and would double down. I think the paranoia and anxiety made it worse and it went less from "they're trying to help" and straight to "this is all they're focusing on and trying to push it on me".
I haven't personally used smart other than just reading a few articles, but knowing it's more behavior based and mindful based seems a much better positive start other than "You must accept Jesus as your savior because without him you will fail" hubaloo lol
Sister ⋅ January 28, 2018
I've been seeing a lot of discontent about OD. The way I see it, what's done is done.
Gilraent Sister ⋅ January 28, 2018
I'm just going to keep doing what I'm doing. I still haven't been there since this morning. Still trying to catch up with all y'all lol lol
I do think I will write an exclusive entry for OD. not that it will matter. I just have some thoughts floating around my head.
Star Maiden ⋅ January 29, 2018
I deleted my OD and I don't want to pay. So, no point in even visiting.
I rather be there, but I don't want to deal with it.
Gilraent Star Maiden ⋅ January 29, 2018
I'm hearing a lot of this, and I don't blame anyone for it.
Funny, it took me years to finally see Prose as "home", then OD comes back. I'm still on the fence about how I feel about it. Too many glitches since it went live.
I'm sticking around here mainly, but at the same time, with the lifetime membership... I kind of want to take advantage of it, y'know?
Star Maiden Gilraent ⋅ January 29, 2018
Meh, I just figure he'll up and leave it again.
Gilraent Star Maiden ⋅ January 29, 2018
Yep. In the entries I've written over there I mention it every time, and he responds every time "We're working on the speed" blah blah. After the entry I wrote last night, he left this note "We are going to be very careful to make sure that doesn’t happen, but I totally respect your concern. Hopefully time will prove that this place can be great again."
Still don't trust him as far as I can throw him when it comes to OD. I mean, he's a nice guy, but an asshole at the same time.