Mentally Freefalling in Hanging on for dear Life

To be honest, I don’t know why I’ve been drawn to this place. Maybe it’s the loneliness that’s been haunting me for so long. Maybe it’s the endless emotions that come over me at any moment with no warning what so ever. Maybe it’s the need of letting it all out to finally be able to let go of what’s broken me down to the point where I feel as though there is no coming back. All I know is there’s no hurt in trying. It’s not like anyone is listening anyways. No one cares about me or how my life has turned out. Anyone who’s come in to my life left with no intentions of looking back at the mess they left behind. Endless tears. Lost soul. Stolen dreams. Shattered heart. Infinite of pieces trying to be placed back together. But no matter what’s done it’s never fully repaired. It’s never the same. Malformed with cracks and voids as there are no instructions on how to rebuild. Fear, mistrust, insecurities, self doubt, all creep back in to your mind no matter how hard you try and evict them. Some days it just seems so pointless to go on. I am my own worst enemy. My mind won’t allow me to just stop. I just want it to stop 😢