February 16th, 2011 in "Waiting for my Petrichor"

The job fell through because my background check came up "ineligible". It was fucked off too the way they called me 2 hours prior to starting my training. I was in the process of getting ready for my first day of work and they call me to say that crap. I literally started freaking out and crying. I needed this job SO bad. You have no idea. I can afford rent for March and after that I am screwed. I will have about 200 bucks to live off of for food/gas. I am going to go back into working full-time at finding a job aka filling out more and more applications. And if I don't land something by the end of March I am going to be forced to move back to California. I will have failed miserably. My dream life in Washington will be no more. The worst part will be leaving Dave. I am falling in love with him. I want to marry him. He is the best thing that has ever happened to me. He says he will pay my rent until I get back on my feet, but I care for him too much to let him do that...you know? Not that it would be a burden on him since he makes about 3200 a month. But still. I just couldn't let him do such a thing for me. I am not worth it.