I don’t know if joey doesn’t know what ivf fully involves, whether he thinks it’s a walk in the park, but honest to god I am starting to get so frustrated and a little resentful that he could ask me to do something so huge so we can both gain from it, but can’t just give up the freaking beers.
Don’t get me wrong, he’s been so much better, and I know I give him nothing but a bad press here, I truly am just venting all my frustrations, he’s not a bad guy, just a stupid one sometimes. I don’t know if he thinks what’s the point seeing as we’ll probably have to do ivf anyway, what difference does a few beers make, but to me it would mean the world of difference, it would make me feel some solidarity, and that he has some understanding of what he’s asking me to do.
I’m under absolutely no illusion as to how difficult the process is physically, and what a complete mind fuck it’s going to be. I’m crazy enough now with just my own regular hormones to worry about. And you know what, I make no apologies for that. Maybe it’s a woman thing, wanting the best for your child before its even here. I know for a lot of men babies are a bit of an abstract notion until they’re actually here. There’s not quite the same connection.
I asked him yesterday if he and Claire had talked about ivf when they found out initially about his sperm, and he said they talked about it but she didn’t want to do it. Maybe there’s some hesitation because he’s not really convinced it’ll happen when push comes to shove, I don’t know.
Or maybe he’s just a selfish pain in the arse.
Xx
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