My best friend’s grandmother died this morning. I am very close to their family, so this is a big blow. She went into hospice care last weekend, so it was expected, but it still hurts.
I haven’t taken my psych meds in almost a week. It was a combination of reasons that led to that happening. I’m going to start up again tonight because of course I have to, but also because I’ve been drifting between extremely depressed to numb and foggy the last few days. I can’t keep this up.
Husband is at work all day today, Mom and Daughter are off kid-sitting for the afternoon, and Brother-in-law is going to be picking me up in a half hour for lunch. I’m not even hungry, but I’ll get sick if I don’t eat something.
It’s always overwhelming to think about how much there is to be sad about in life. I know we’re not supposed to dwell on it all the time, but I’ve spent the majority of my life in mourning, so yeah. I don’t really know another way to be.
I hope the memorial service is next weekend, when I can go to it. I want to be there.
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