m28 in idea barrages

Why say you’re a “circuit rider” when you could say you’re “giving out preach-arounds”?

“Hozier” just sounds like the fancy Quebec way to say “Hoser”. Like “ooh, Molson XXX instead of Labatts Blue, look at the little hos-ee-ay!”

What would be terrible would be a remake of Auntie Mame for the modern age called AUNTIE MEME.

I don’t wear a beard as it’s the only place I’m grey. Without a beard, I can pass for my middle 30s, I think, despite being 10 years older than that. With a grey chin, people would just assume I’m a retiree. Allow me my vanity, Ladies Who Rave About Beards, please.

I mean, we all agree that “the Houston Texans” is the dumbest laziest name for a sports team in history, right? Calling Miami “Heat” or Utah “Jazz” is at least charming in an absurdist way. “We got a football team to name. What kinda people live here?” “Texans.” “There ya go.”

Few songs could not be improved by a sprinkling of audio samples from the award-winning Super Nintendo game “Mario Paint”.

Your band’s mascot will be Hervé Villechaize in a Hamburglar get-up and you will call yourselves PRISON TATTOO.

If the Bible taught us ANYTHING, it’s don’t get involved with Pilates.