aug4 in idea barrages

HAMILTON but it’s about Linda Hamilton. 15 hip-hop musical numbers about what a douche-nozzle James Cameron is.

You will cover the Moody Blues as country line dance songs as THE BOOTY MOOS.

An incredibly boring person rapping that their milquetoast brings all the boys to the yard.

Maybe our nation’s lack of light-rail infrastructure was the real Trolley Problem we found along the way.

Every time things get too close to real change, they send out someone with an official sounding title to say aliens are real, with no evidence whatsoever, and we eat it right up. Even lab rats learn to not eat the electrified cheese but, nope, not us. MONKEY JUST WANNA MEET E.T.

I hope that someday, future historians will get access to partial records of our culture and come to warped conclusions. I hope that they think Iykyk is some kind of weird Scandinavian god of secret wisdoms.

Every commercial for the television show TRACKER looks like a comedy sketch making fun of prime-time network action shows, that would be cut from the final programme for “coming off as too mean-spirited in its mockery”.

Why say “serrated bread knife” when you could say “carbin’ steel”?