Thursday night M came home. It’s been so nice to have him to talk to again. Though I can barely get a word in most of the time haha. Since we got home so late and both had to work in the morning, the homecoming festivities (banging) had to wait until Friday.
Friday my coworkers and I actually had a casual conversation about housing, moving and buying a house, which feels like progress.
Friday night was lovely. We cooked dinner, I did some arty stuff, watched some shows and Weird Science, and then banged.
Saturday was the Fae Ball so I spent all day waiting to leave to go get ready with Red. it was a little agonizing, the wait, and I kept myself as busy as I could while still keeping an eye on the time. Time blindness suuucks.
The Ball was nice. I wore this long red gown with a really low neckline and a slit up the left leg with a witchy tiara and red vinyl bat wings. I did my makeup to look a little evil, red eye shadow, black outlined red lips… but it just wasn’t evil looking enough, so I painted a red stripe over my eyes. We ubered from Red’s to the hotel, made our entrance, and immediately took to the buffet (it was light, charcuterie, cut fruit etc). We waited in line for a moment with the photographer, I’m excited to see what my whole outfit looked like.
We sort of lost our thrill after sitting around for a while. I thought we’d be dancing, but no one (in our group) was into that. We wanted to wait for the next round of food (donuts, though apparently there was a poutine buffet but I never saw it), so we ended up going to the bar across the hall in the hotel and eating dessert before ubering back home. I had not really planned whether I’d be driving home or not, but I was so utterly sober driving home wasn’t an issue.
Except when I got home, I found M in the bathroom, in a state of mental distress. He helped me out of my dress and filled me in that he’d accidentally eaten too much weed, and was having anxiety and nausea as a result. He was adamant that we fall asleep together, so I went upstairs to give him privacy and take off my makeup. I got into bed and waited for M. At one point I heard him puking, and then silence. After a while I began to worry, I texted him because I didn’t want to intrude on his privacy by calling for him. But I ended up doing that anyway because he never responded. Turns out after puking he fell asleep on the living room floor. When I called to him, he came upstairs. He was clearly feeling better, chatting away, asking about my night. We talked for quite some time, until he realized he was feeling so much better that he wanted to bang.
Afterwards we passed out in the bed together, and even when I woke up to pee in the middle of the night I went back to sleep with him because it just seemed to be working. Normally I’d leave in the middle of the night because one of us was snoring.
This morning I was so tired. I didn’t want to do anything. M was insistent we drive into town so he could buy a garbage can to get the shed in order. I ended up working more on the post holes for the greenhouse. And since ticks are the latest terror in this hellscape, we found one in the house after we came back inside. Both of us stripped down and checked each other over. Fuck I hate ticks.
I spent most of the afternoon in the art room, with a break to watch F1 and make and eat dinner, and then a break again to watch another episode of Andor.
I’m having a hard time not looking forward to work… or more specifically feeling anxious about it. I think I just need to keep going to prove to myself that it’s not as bad as my brain is making it out to be. Aside from it being a bit quiet, last week wasn’t that bad. It was tough because M was away, more than not talking at work. I’m sure things will continue to improve.
I need to get to bed.
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