so ive been given an ultimatum. its him or my husband. in Just need to write

Do you know how hard it is to chose between my husband and the man who ive like and maybe even love for the last 6 months? I get that the decision should be easy but its not. I love my husband as a person and the father of my kids but im not in love with him. I will always love him but I just think that after so much hurt and disappointment that ill never feel the same. It will never be like before all the hurt. There's things I just cant get over.
With D....I like him alot. I like what he gives me. I love the challenge with him. I love how exciting it is to see each other. I love the feeling I get whrn I hear his ring tone. I love our conversations.
Is it wrong that I want them both? Is it wrong that im afraid to make the first move in case I regret my decision?