Ramble Update in My life....I can't make this shit up!

Apparently I’m still bad with keeping up with writing. I haven’t wrote since October of last year. Sorry.
We’re still in the same house, at least until December 15th. We convinced the landlord to give us one more year. My credit score keeps playing a rise and fall game. Brian’s however continues to rise, so our hope is he can get a mortgage. If not I’m not sure what’s going to happen at the end of the year. I’m trying hard not to think about that though as we all muddle though this pandemic situation.
Luckily Brian and I have been able to continue to work. His office furloughed 90% of the staff. He was one of the lucky 10% who kept his position. My office has stopped seeing patients/clients in person since March so I have been working from home. Cameron’s school has been virtual since the end of March, so I’ve had to learn to be mom, teacher, wife, and still do my job as a supervisor/case manager. I go to the office once a week to once every other week to check my mail and fax a few things. I’m usually not there for more than three or four hours. Like I said, there are no patients/clients so it’s just a small handful of employees and I generally can stay away from them. I am going crazy not having anywhere to go. A week ago Saturday I snapped on Brian because I was so depressed and felt so utterly alone. While he goes to work during the day, I’m alone with Cameron (who just turned 12!). After Cam finishes with his work, in typical pre-teen fashion, he locks himself up in his room. So I’m alone in the living room with the dog and cats and my work. Brian gets home around 5 and would go to bed between 7:30 and 8, leaving me alone....again. I haven’t been sleeping well either, so I don’t fall asleep until 1 or 2 AM and I’m up at 6:30 when he leaves for work. After my epic meltdown he has been trying to stay awake and engaging in the evenings and has been real mindful of getting me out of the house on the weekends. Last night I yelled at him because he was adamant that he go pick up dinner. I have not been out of the house since Sunday afternoon, I told him I was going out, alone, for 20 minutes and he was staying home. He must have realized and didn’t argue.
Like I said before, Cameron turned 12 a couple weeks ago. Since his 3rd birthday we spend his birthday at Disney for a week, this was the first year we couldn’t go to the parks since then. I think it bothered me more than it bothered him, honestly. We worked hard at giving him a great couple of days though. We started the night before when I “grounded” him to his room. My mother came over and we decorated our front yard with a giant blow up happy birthday cake, banners, pinwheels, etc. all over the front yard and inside the house. When he came out of his room we pelted him with confetti balls. He got to open his first present, a smart watch. For his birthday my parents came over and we had a little pizza party for him. He got more of his gifts and we told him his biggest present was not going to be delivered until sometime in May. He was cool with that. The day following his birthday was a bit of a struggle because Cameron was upset that his planned sleep over with my parents was canceled and he couldn’t be told why. What he didn’t know was Brian’s nephew had put together a parade of tow trucks, Brian’s sister, and Brian’s parents to drive up and down our street making tons of noise. We hadn’t seen any of my in-laws since the quarantine. Brian has gone to see his parents, but Cam and I stayed away. They’re both immunocompromised and we didn’t’ want to take that chance. He was thrilled with it, and after the ‘parade’ he went and had his sleep over at my folks.
Just like a lot of folks, we’re slowly starting to venture out, wearing our masks. The mall near us opened up last week so Saturday we went to see if we could get to some of our favorite stores - while the mall itself was open, all the stores I wanted to shop in were still closed. So we ventured to Target (these are the first places Cam and I have gone that is not Publix) which was crazy busy. We picked up some Mother’s Day gifts for our mom’s and came home.
The Beaches in our county opened last week as well. We were going to go for a drive up the Island and down the River, but we couldn’t even get to the Island. The traffic was backed up for miles of the Causeway that we decided it wasn’t even worth it.
My birthday is in 2 days. I’m not looking forward to it. Again, for the last 8 years we would go to the parks to celebrate, and with everything closed what is there to do. I don’t want to take the risk of any of us getting sick. Brian keeps bothering me to pick something to do. He doesn’t realize how depressed I’ve been feeling. Part of me can’t wait to get back into my office, while another part of me wants to wait a whole year to be safe. I’m sure a lot of people feel the same way.

I’m supposed to be working right now, and since I’ve been working at home my administrators are demanding I write down what I do during the day, so I need to go find work to write down. I don’t think they’d be happy with “wrote in my blog” for 30 minutes on my schedule. One perk of being able to work from home has been my ability to maintain the house and laundry. I’ve found myself cleaning up and doing other projects between work. Oh, and my puppy snuggles during the day. Those are awesome too!