March 28th Barrage in idea barrages

1.) If this van's a-rockin', time to put new shocks in.

2.) Light board is both wave board AND particle board!

3.) There isn't an article on Jezebel called "Fat Guys Are Better At Sex Because We Know We Have To Be". But there SHOULD be.

4.) Papa Roach "Last Resort" about doing a book report? Probably.

5.) I like to smoosh the little bits of dying bar soaps together and make "conglomerate soap". Because I'm a nerd.

6.) If I had a chiptune act, it would be called "The Dreaded Underwater Level".

7.) Nothing like an obscenely privileged person abusing New Age neologisms to tell people she's even better at DIVORCE than we are.

8.) Oh, you know. Just tying together tampons as nun-chucks for the dog's Ninja Turtle costume. As you do.