The Backpacking Trip That Wont Be in 2019 Amazing Stories!

I was supposed to go on a 3-day, 2 Night backpacking trip this weekend with a small group of like 6 people. A few of us went last year in July to Cutthroat Pass and had a blast. This upcoming trip was supposed to be at Joffre Lakes up in British Columbia. I even got my Enhanced License for this trip because I don’t have a valid passport anymore (name changed when I got married, didn’t reapply for a new one and now its like 11 years old). We were supposed to leave tomorrow (Friday) morning and come back Sunday evening. The trip has been cancelled. They were only able to get camping permits for Friday and they didn’t want to drive the 5 hours to camp for 1 night. Which is understandable, but still a bummer.

I had requested Friday (tomorrow) off from work for this, and guyyyyyyys I am not telling them the trip has been cancelled. I am still taking tomorrow off goshdarnitall. I will do my own hiking this weekend. I will still relax. I will try my best not to think of work.

One of the things I’m supposed to do for homework for therapy is write stuff down and then burn it. I kind of want to write out a 2 weeks notice to my boss and then burn it, just to see how it feels to write something like that/ what exactly I would even say when the time comes/if it makes me feel any better.

There’s a lot I need to write down, but even though its for my eyes only and will be eventually burned its still hard to submit myself to the process. Like really hard. My last session was an absolute waste because I just couldn’t talk. Some of it I think it lingering mistrust after the April/May/June hiatus. I think she expected me to be able to pick up right where we left off, but I need her to be patient with me after all I went through with A) her hiatus and B) the crazy interim therapist. The thing is, if I stop therapy with her, I don’t see myself shopping around for a new therapist. At least not right away. She’s assured me that she’ll be where she’s at now for 4 years because she signed a contract. I just have a really hard time opening up to people and hate myself when I waste sessions. Basically, I’m just mad at myself. Others too, but mostly myself.

Anyway, this entry is all over the place, and I’ve actually been slowly working on it allllll day, and it’s not even a long entry!

I’m gonna enjoy my 3 days weekend. Maybe I’ll turn it into a 4 day weekend. I told work that I thought we’d be coming back late Sunday night. They said “take Monday off if you need a day to catch up”. Well, we’ll see where my mood is come Sunday night and I just might.

Last updated August 22, 2019