It'll Be Different. Like It Was In The Beginning. in I Can't Believe It's Not Twitter™... Spray!

[Brownie points to whomever can name the movie the title is from.]

[Note: once in a while I will expound upon a tweet, if I feel the tweet was insufficient or I just have the urge to say more. But usually not.]
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Y'know, as far as desolations go, Smaug's seems rather cozy.

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Shock humor is like a jacuzzi: the longer you're immersed in it, the more you think it needs to be turned up, despite protests of newcomers.

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I usually can only barely tell 1080p from 720p, so no, I probably won't be jumping onto the 4k resolution train any time soon.

[I think the only way it's relevant is if you've got a mobile device up close to your face, which is a habit I'd rather not get myself into, or if you're going to have a ridiculously huge TV (bigger than 42"), otherwise I don't think it'd be worth the extra cost or energy expended.]

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Outside right now it is zero degrees. You won't find a single degree out there. But at least it's not an anti-degree vacuum any more.

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They should make lemon and orange versions of fig bar cookies. Call them Juice Newtons. #80sHumorToday

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"Some are born with cold feet; others have cold feet thrust upon them." #BedtimeTruisms

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One of the hardest things to do is keep things in perspective. Even saying that it's one of the hardest things is a bit lacking in perspective.

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You are a unique snowflake: A freezing dust particle with a randomly generated hexagonal pattern likely to go unnoticed when shoveled aside.

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I saw a post labeled "25 Foods You Have To Eat Before You Die."

I assume Snopes has already disproven such a rule.

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Some say art can't be defined, but I think we can at least narrow it down by process of elimination. For instance, Excel crashing? Not art.

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My khajit assassin's name is Philtrum, because he's always right under your nose. #ESO

[Explanation: I was an early beta-tester for the game Elder Scrolls Online. Also, I misspelled khajiit, hurting my Geek Cred, but in my defence, the two i's next to each other is stupid.]

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This One Weird Trick Introverted Magicians Don't Want You To Know About.

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"I wear my heart on my sleeve."
"Really? How does it keep from falling off?"
"It's emotionally gripping."
"Oh."

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::wakes up from dream, does Google search::

Well, either my subconscious has invented tethergolf, or Google's search features are overrated.

[I've since been informed that "tethergolf," as I envisioned it, would be a very dangerous activity.]

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Hey, kids! Like to do grown-up things? Then you'll LOVE the game, "Stand In Front Of The Open Cabinet And Wonder Why You're There."

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It just clicked for me that "GMTA" is "Great Minds Think Alike" (and not "Greenwich Mean Time Agents" or "German Music Television Awards.")

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My deepest, darkest nerd secret might be that everything since Windows XP has been a technological blur to me.

[Though really I could expand that and just say life since 2004 has been mostly a blur.]

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Them: "It's sad how many people you don't learn about 'til they've died."
Me: "Yeah, like Gandhi or Plato."
Them: "Huh?
Me: "They've died."
Them: "I'm talking about people you didn't know anything about until they'd died."
Me: "So am I. They both died before I knew about them."

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I think a lot of us want to be just famous enough so that our mundane lives are seen as down-to-earth and keeping it real.

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I know Walt Disney said "If you can dream it, you can do it," but that's only because he'd never seen some of my weirder dreams.

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Trivia: Eskimos have no word for etymology.

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Chicken in the bread pan, peckin' out dough.
Worst. Panera. Ever.

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Actually, according to some unverified studies I found at specific sites I chose based on my own personal worldview, you're wrong.

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I am still not comfortable with the phrase "Disney's Star Wars."

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I'm told that "doggy ice cream" is ice cream for dogs.
So now I'm wondering if I misunderstood fish tacos.

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Someone should make math-nerd-style baby announcements that read, "A New Addition, Courtesy Of The Multiplication Division!"

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Hey, people merging onto the roundabout: the sign says "Yield," not "Come At Me, Bro."

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"If you I were, say such things, I would not." - Yoda Humperdink, "The Princess Leia Bride"

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Okay, that's all for now.