It’s almost 1am and I can’t sleep. This happened last night too. I don’t understand what is going on with my body. My appetite is insatiable and not in the oh it’s so cute that I’m always hungry kind of way. It’s more like my hands shake, head starts to get woozy and my stomach feels like it is starting to metabolize itself. I have this irrational fear of my body running out of fat to metabolize and will start to metabolize my heart instead. My anxiety is so high because I can also feel a pressure inside my head that makes me feel unbalanced. This happened once before and I assumed that it was because there was not enough variation in my diet at that time, which could be the case this time too. My thyroid and insulin was tested last month and those results were normal so I wouldn’t even know what to make of this. I’m on a cleanse from alcohol, could this just be withdrawal? Lol I do like my wine
I don’t even have any food prepped, I’ve been too fatigued. I thought that I was going to have energy today so I worked out and then I felt like I was going to faint after my shower because my hunger hit me so hard and so fast. This happened yesterday when I went for a run and I took a back road and I was in the middle of nowhere so that freaked me out. I thought that was a fluke. So I haven’t had anything prepped in days and I didn’t have access to the kitchen when this hunger attack happened so I went to a drive thru for a few Beyond Meat burgers. That didn’t fix the pressure in my head and the wooziness that I was experiencing so I spent the rest of the day laying down and watching Netflix. I have my beans and chickpeas soaking and I am going to spend a few hours meal prepping. My body appears to want more fuel than I am used to which makes no sense.
I had issues with my inner ears before, maybe I have an inner ear infection or something easy like that. Oh, here is a random factoid: I should be completely deaf right now. I was born with holes in my eardrums but I had an operation and that was fixed. I’m sensitive to high pitches because of the scar tissue.
I’m too stubborn to see my doctor. I will make sure that I am getting my calories in and see how I feel in a day or two. The real reason that I am writing an entry at 1am is because I randomly remembered a creepy video of a ghost caught on camera and I don’t want to think about that rn. I need a man
Last updated August 13, 2019