Vote of Confidence in Current Events

Bev asked for my help yesterday to move and build some furniture and I also wanted my sister and her husband to have a day to themselves before he goes back to work so I decided to spend the day with Bev. I also brought her my Blu-ray copy of Repo the Genetic Opera for her to borrow. She’s been seeing somebody new and she wants to introduce him to her fav cult classics. We cracked open a bottle of wine and took a little break from all the work that we were doing and sat in her backyard for a bit. She told me that she learned yesterday that Chris, her soon to be ex-husband, was also seeing somebody new. She was all for it until she learned that this woman has two kids of her own. “Don’t tell your wife and two sons that you do not want to have a wife and two sons anymore if you’re just going to date a woman who has two sons.” Bev is a little hurt and confused but she is a very strong woman and knows that this will not hurt her forever.

I feel like the universe brought Bev and I together because we are both ending big chapters in our lives and starting new ones. She offered to come with me to the university on Tuesday to be my moral support and like… why can’t my regular friends love me like that?

Hetal called me while I was at Bevs house. She was feeling stressed out and wanted to get out of her head for a bit. I told her that I was in her part of town and so she offered to cook for me so I couldn’t say no to that. When I got there she wanted to vent about work for a bit which is a little uncomfortable for me since I was fired from there and all but it’s not up to her to manage my feelings about it so I just listened. She still hasn’t told her parents that she is returning to India in a couple of weeks to marry the love of her life. It’s not an arranged marriage so she is prepared to be disowned. Her boyfriend’s family is happy about it but like, men get to make choices over there. I’m lowkey worried that she will be honour killed by his or her parents. What if his parents expect a dowry that her family can’t honour because it was not an arranged marriage? Mandeep and Amandeep have told me horror stories about witnessing women get beaten to death or burned alive on the streets for families failing to produce a dowry… If jumping to worse case scenarios was an Olympic sport I would have a box full of gold medals. Hetal is just stressed because her soon to be husband is a jobber and has to be nagged to complete any paperwork that she forwards him in regards to their marriage and his immigration to Canada. She told me something kind of cool today. She said that in India there is no relationship status called “single”. You’re either married, unmarried, divorced or widowed. Just the bluntness of it all.

After we ate she suggested that we go for a walk to the river. When we got there I pointed out the park on the other side. I asked if she had ever been and she said no so I drove us there. She fell in love with it. She wants to go back by herself and just sit there in peace for hours.

I brought up how nervous I am about what comes next in my life. That I want to take a course in Human Nutritional Studies at the University but I am pretty confident that I will get rejected if I apply. If their rejection letters came with an explanation as to why that would be great. I told her that my grades from high school were awful so I would probably have to go back and get better grades. Also, I would probably need to take chemistry and applied math. She told me that if I need help with math that I could call her or bring my studies to her place and she will help me. Like, why can’t my regular friends love me like that? Theoretically, I should have those answers tomorrow when I go down there and talk to a student advisor. Also, she told me that Karamjeet seems to always know when I hang out with Hetal. She and Brad, my old boss, always start asking a million questions about what I am doing now. She always tells them that she doesn’t know. She is putting in her notice very shortly, she can’t wait to leave that place.

I was talking shit about Karamjeet and Hetal told me that I am going to make myself sick thinking so negative about her. That I should just work on my own karma. She said that I will be in school and advancing myself in life and she will still be working at that miserable place. Let that be my “revenge.” She is so right.

I am feeling pressed because I have to be on a payroll in four weeks. I can stretch that out if I am willing to dip into my credit. This is crunch time for me this week. I have to make it all happen. I’m just feeling a little unsteady about it. When I talked to Colleen the other day and filled her in on everything she said that she knows that she does not have to worry about me finding work. She is confident that I will land something, anything. She and Hetal both told me within days of each other that they do not have to worry about me. They trust in my abilities work things out. That vote of confidence is exactly what I needed. The universe sure works in mysterious ways. I should stop saying that I do not have any friends because this weekend proved me wrong.