Naght and Diy in Book Six: Trying to Hold On 2019

  • April 24, 2019, 7:21 p.m.
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The differences between my mornings are stark and I would officially like to blame sleep. And in so doing, somewhat blame other elements but I’d rather simply imply those elements rather than blame them outright.

Yesterday, I left work to get to City Hall. Got my permits all worked out and paid for. Drove home. Wife and Nala were nowhere to be seen and Nala’s leash was gone. Figured they were on a walk and… considering Wife walks the Dog a much shorter distance much closer to the home, I figured it would be a snap to find them. Turns out, she had started to give the dog a walk… then decided to burn our leaves instead. So the dog was in her harness and Wife had the leash; but Wife was tending a leaf fire. The dog was super happy to see me and proceeded to be very silly. Like… running around the yard, then sliding into a long slide, then getting up to run around some more. Due to the leaf burning… the previous homeowners did very little raking and instead had a yard full of leaves and a fire pit filled to overflowing with yard debris… Wife basically sat outside staring at the leaf pile for hours. It would smoke and smolder, then the leaves would catch for a while, then it would smoke and smolder. Wife’s theory was that the heat was drying out the wet leaves, which would catch when dried, then the process would repeat. I tried engaging Nala in some actual exercise and play which worked okay for a while but for her pattern of getting super excited then trying to bite me. Another concern of the play is that Nala forgets to consider whether she may need to use the bathroom. Outside for several hours and did not pee. Came back inside… drank a lot of water… went back out… and did not pee. SO I figured that she’d pee in our house at some point… guaranteed. At 6:30 we had to put her in the 3 Season Room and go work out. Somewhat disappointing as I have 100% plateaued. When we came back home, I wanted to get Nala’s food ready before we let her back inside. So… I’m in the mud room pouring dog food… wife is on the other side of the house… and I hear her saying something. I ask her to repeat and catch… most of it? I come out with the food and set it down and ask her what the very last part of what she was saying was again. She repeats herself with a great deal of attitude. We then open the door to the 3 Season Room and note that there is a lot of liquid near the Dog Bed/Door Area. As expected, she had to pee!
Wife starts complaining and says, “It might be water that she dragged over.”
I inform her it isn’t likely as her water bowl had not moved from where I set it. As she’s standing there… just looking at it… I go to actually get the Spray Bottle and a Towel. As Wife sees what I’ve gathered, she shouts that I shouldn’t clean it up yet. She wants to get a white towel to see if the fluid comes up as yellow to verify if it is pee or not. I’m bristling a little at this point. In the ten minutes since we’ve been home… I’ve gotten attitude because I needed her to repeat something, inaction at an event that requires action, and criticism over taking action. I sit down in the 3 Season Room and tell her that if she wants to do something before I clean up, she’s welcome to.
She goes to grab a white napkin, wipes a bit of fluid up and says, “Well, it doesn’t look yellow so it probably isn’t pee.”
I respond with, “I still think it is pee and whether it is or not, it needs to be cleaned up.”
I begin to wipe the floor.
Wife responds, “Ew. The bed is damp and her blanket is damp, too.”
I ask, “Is it machine washable?”
Wife looks upset and quickly retorts, “Is what Machine Washable?”
I suppress the sigh and simply say, “The bed. Is it machine washable?”
“Well, Nala’s bitten a hole through it, so I’d have to sew that up before putting it into the wash. What are we going to do about the blanket?”
While cleaning the floor, I respond: “I know for sure that is machine washable, we’ve done it enough times.”
Wife becomes angry and says, “Yeah? And how do you plan to do that?! The dirty clothes is empty since I did laundry yesterday.”
Instead of solving the problem for her (the answer is bloody obvious) I simply say, with some anger behind my voice, “Describing a problem is not the same as coming up with a solution. When solutions are needed, focus on solutions.”
Wife became upset and went to the kitchen to do dishes. I finished cleaning up the floor and left the bed and blanket. Wife requests my assistance in helping her dry the dishes she’s cleaning by hand. While doing that, she asks me to pour the flour/salt/pepper onto a plate to help start Dinner Prep. I do so as best I can without getting any on me as I am trying to do that while also helping her dry dishes.

After this I take a shower (much needed after the workout). Nala demonstrates a great deal of curiosity about the bathtub and I am certain that if I were taking a bath, she would have jumped in with me. After the shower, I throw on some sweats pants and a sweatshirt and take Nala outside hoping that she’ll pee or poop. Instead, she decides that she wants to socialize with our neighbor who is recovering from back surgery by taking slow walks around the neighborhood. So, I go chase the little ornery one and bring her back inside. By the time I’m back inside, Wife has cooked dinner and set it on the table. These kinds of things are important to mention as Wife does do a fair share around the house in regards to cooking and cleaning. We ate dinner, then I excused myself for a few seconds to input a code into my Gaming Console before it expired.

While I was doing that… I noticed a large number of my friends and colleagues were online playing Overwatch. When it hit me! It was Tuesday! I hadn’t been part of a Tuesday Night Game Night in… hell… months, easily. But… I had told Wife that I would be right back up… so I input the code and returned upstairs. She and the dog were on the couch; her plate still on the table. I moved the dishes to their appropriate places, and noticed that the leftovers had been put into a small plastic container. The lid hadn’t been put on or anything but half of taking care of the leftovers was done. It did annoy me a bit. Doing a job half-assed or simply doing half of a job just kind of rubs me the wrong way. So I put the lid on, threw it into the refrigerator, and then cleaned up any other Juice Bottle, Bag, or Ingredient Box that could be returned to its point of origin. Then I returned to the couch. As we had worked out so late, returning to the couch was at about 9:30 ish.

Wife then got up to shower and I agreed to watch Nala. As Wife showered, she asked me to bring her my facemask to clean it. She did not think I was doing a good enough job cleaning the mask portion and wanted to do it herself to make sure I didn’t get sick. Problem is.... the mask is connected to the headpiece… so her idea to clean it in the shower meant the fabric that attaches it to my head would get wet as well. Not to mention this is all happening at 9:30… when, in order to get around 8 hours of sleep, I should be out by 10. I let Nala out many times as Wife was showering. But around 10:00, I came back inside… went to the bedroom… and laid down. Obviously couldn’t sleep… turned on Kung Fu Hustle and tried to sleep. Wife comes in around 11:30 (I’m still awake) and hands me the APAP Mask saying it should be “at least dry enough to use now.” It.... kind of was. At that point I didn’t much care. Just throw the bloody thing on and try to get some sleep before it got any later in the night.

I awoke at 5 a.m. and the headset still felt damp. I figured sod it, took it off, and went back to sleep. When I awoke again at 6:30, Wife was awake but not out of bed. I could see her green eyes, her white skin, her breasts (something I’ve been seeing less and less of the last few months). She asked why I had taken the mask off and I told her. She informed me that I had been snoring like I used to. I got up, fed the dog… the dog was happy to hang out for a while, then quickly trotted back to her dog bed, curled up, and fell asleep again.

I put on my shirt, tie, suit pants, suit jacket, belt, socks, and shoes. The whole while wishing I was naked and balls deep in something. I’m still a bit sleepy but climb into my car still wishing I could either have sex or block out a significant portion of time for some quality porn viewing. So my spirit on the drive in to work this morning is markedly different from yesterday. Whereas yesterday, I was filled with creativity and eroticism hope… this morning I’m filled with unmet desires and sleepiness. And to top it all off, at the section of the road that goes from 55 to 45 as you enter town? A construction car honked at me. I was reducing my speed from 55 to 45 but apparently was not doing it fast enough; so an approaching construction vehicle honked at me. I don’t know why that sets me off so but… it certainly did.

So now… I’m fighting my eyes shutting because I’m tired. I have at least an hour’s worth of hearings at 11:00. But at least those are the last hearings I really need to be personally involved in this week. There are a few at the end of the week that I’ll be attending; but the Assistant Attorney General will be handling those matters.

But talk about regret… at least in a small way. Tuesday Night: no video game time, no sexual expression, and not enough sleep. Granted… the fantasy is Harem-y and disrespectful to women… but I find my mind floating to a “how would fiction handle that?” And I think of a classic harem set up. The hot nerdy girl is playing video games with me; while the hot strong girl is giving my a shoulder rub; while the two sexy gentle ones are kissing my neck or being more inventive. See… even in a “harem set up” where I could arguably suggest as many women as possible, I limit myself to 4! Hopefully… proof that I don’t need a lot… I just need some.
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Something I seem to be doing more and more.... I apologize for not leaving more notes at all, more detailed notes, or more heartfelt notes. Something lately has just… made me completely re-think my approach to things. Like… I try to be a person that listens, understands, and remarks on what I heard. But I worry that I too often jump in with something that makes it about me; and that isn’t acceptable. Plus, I just feel like I understand people less these days than I once did. Not because of the Defendants I see. I am able to separate that out mostly. The people I see in court I do not believe are the majority of humans… I don’t, for instance, think a person would “react violently against another in response to every emotion.” But then… between spending my time with attorneys, judges, defendants, and Wife… I’m not really getting access to a lot of “normal” people. I don’t say that disparagingly but… Law School tells you often that it is all about fundamentally changing the way you think and view things. So the fact that my IRL contacts with real people are all Graduates of Law School, Criminals, or Wife… says a lot to me.
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AAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand as a Wednesday I should have fucking expected this.

30 Year Old Man. Got a ticket a month ago. Went to court today to say he doesn’t want to pay the ticket. I look into this ticket.
RADAR: 79 MPH in a 65 MPH Zone
Ticket: 1 to 5 MPH Over Speed Limit

This guy received a ticket for 9 miles per hour less than what he was actually doing. 9 miles per hour is a huge deal financially. The ticket he received? $87.00. The ticket he deserved? $168.00. So… fighting this is stupid as shit anyway. Instead of calling over to schedule talking with me, or calling me to talk with me… this man storms over to the office and demands to see me immediately. Dude… even if this were a murder trial, that isn’t how things work!

I tell my secretary that, as I don’t have anything from the court… this isn’t technically in my que… and with the hearings I have this morning, I’m too busy to just randomly see a guy that shows up demanding to see me… I give her a business card and ask her to tell him to schedule something because… yeah, that’s the proper practice.

She comes back after ten minutes just PISSED. Apparently, this guy was furious that I wouldn’t drop what I was doing to talk with him. He kept saying, “I was in court, where the fuck was he?!” That… isn’t how court works. Initial Appearance happens outside of my presence because that is when Defendants may get assigned attorneys and, if a Defendant requests an attorney, I’m legally not allowed to discuss the case with them. But this guy was furious and continued to demand that I see him, that if HE had to drop what he was doing that day to be in court, I should drop what I’m doing to talk to him!

Dude?!? I quite sincerely don’t care if you’re the Pope’s Identical Brother and God himself told you to come speak with me about your traffic ticket. You’re arguing an almost 50% discount and treating my people like shit because you lack an understanding of decorum and proper practice?? You have my wholehearted invitation to go fuck yourself.

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Well… hrm. Went to Magistrate Court. Here’s the world as it exists:

(1) Case was continued because the Defendant has clear mental health issues and the State would rather he get help than jail
(2) Case was continued because the Defendant does not speak English and the State requires that the Defendant receive adequate assistance to know what is going on in a criminal case (despite it just being a traffic offense)
(3) Woman did not show up for court… instead of being arrested, the State gave the Court one week and, if she did not inform her attorney or the Court as to why she could not appear, then we would send a sheriff out to help her make her appearance
(4) Woman says she has the evidence the State requires; the State moved to suspend the case pending the receipt of that evidence.
(5) Kid has had one full year to prove to the State that he can drive safely and legally. He has failed. The State gave him one week to pass his driving test or plead guilty to all charges. I consider this MORE than merciful… if you have multiple tickets the fact that I’m not barring you from driving is mercy… the fact that I’m giving you the opportunity to re-obtain a driver’s license provided you pass the Driving Test should make you jump for fucking joy.
(6) Case was dismissed based on the completion of No Further Criminal Charges Obtained
(7) Case was continued due to more serious matters being negotiated
(8) Guilty Plea made voluntarily with no enticement by the State
(9) Case was continued due to more serious matters being negotiated

SO… I’m not a bad guy… I want people to take responsibility for their actions, I want people to not shoot themselves in the foot. That’s all. If you do something illegal (yes, even go 35 mph in a 25 mph zone), I think you should be held accountable for your actions. I also don’t think that makes me a bad guy. Further elements?

(10) Guy tells me he never had a Driver’s License from 16 to 48. Started getting in trouble. Now it seems his license gives him nothing but trouble. (Personal City Snobbery Admission: If you’re upset that you’re getting in trouble after driving without a license for 32 YEARS then get over your shit! I don’t care how rural a place is; if you’re driving for 32 years without a license, you should be facing jail time!). Comes in… charged with Driving Under Suspension. Proves that the Suspension shouldn’t have been filed. Proves that the suspension was filed. SO WHAT I HAVE.... a different county suspended him. My county ran his license after a traffic stop and discovered that his license was suspended. Defendant goes to County of Suspension and asks what the hell? They say his payment was late and they re-suspended. He pays on the spot and gets his license re-instated. Comes to me and says that he won’t plead guilty to anything because he can’t pay his fines in the first place because that’s what got him suspended to begin with. THE MAJORITY OF ME THINKS: WHO GIVES A SHIT; POVERTY DOES NOT EXCUSE DECADES OF ILLEGAL DRIVING. But I can understand what happened. Essentially, my plea offer would require him to pay a $325 late fee… his payment was late, he was resuspended, $325 is the fine we’d require from him. I’m not a miserable person… if he can pay court costs, we’ll dismiss. The guy freaks a little… what are court costs? $60. The guy freaks a little more… can he pay that off in $10 installments? SURE. See? The Government isn’t out to get everybody!

(11) An older man from Wisconsin was waiting in the courtroom through all the hearings this afternoon. When the hearings were over, he approached me and asked if he could talk to me about a traffic ticket. He apologized for not being able to return home and schedule something with me but he was from Wisconsin and the drive would have been prohibitive. NOTE: THIS IS NOT THE GUY FROM EARLIER! This man spoke calmly, respectfully, and started the conversation by saying, “I set my cruise control on 60. It may well be the case that my car hit 64 when going down the hill, but it was not my intention to speed at that level. Though I am admitting it was my intention to speed at least between 58 and 60.” I drive that road every day to get to work. I set my cruise between 58 and 60 on that road… there IS a hill where, if you aren’t expecting it or are somewhat not paying attention, your car picks up speed. I had no problem to him pleading to 60 in a 55 as opposed to 64 in a 55. Because taking responsibility is rewarded!

So then I come back to the office. The gentleman from earlier? The asshole that can go fuck himself? Yeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaah. He’s more than just… bad.

So… besides storming a government office, demanding to see a government attorney, and treating my secretary terribly OVER A SPEEDING TICKET THAT IS ALREADY 48% LESS THAN IT SHOULD BE… he had some things to say to the judge even before he came over… making me even MORE happy that I didn’t see him!!

You see, apparently… Defendant demanded that the Court dismiss all charges against him for lack of legal standing due to Corpus Delecti and lack of Subject Matter Jurisdiction according to Black’s dictionary. That SCREAMS “Sovereign Citizen. The individuals who believe that they are not beholden to the laws of the United States because they have not declared themselves to be Citizens of the United States. Which… is funny… because if you are reaping the benefits of being a citizen but demanding sovereign citizenship when it comes to the costs of being a citizen… you’re not an “edgy political rebel” you’re just a tantrum-throwing man baby.

Sovereign Citizens are worth reading up on if you are likewise interested in reading up on why Incels exist. I am not suggesting that SCs are incels but… they make about as much fucking sense. SCs are also a HUGE pain in the ass in court because (little secret) in order for court to function.... the court does need the cooperation of defendants. If, when a Judge asks, “How do you plead?” If you say, “I refuse to plead until you establish that jurisdiction is present pursuant to the 14th Amendment and courpus delecti readings of dicta as surrounds the 1933 move by the treasury to commodify American Citizens.” A lot of judges don’t know how to handle that. And the Judge will ask again, “How do you plead?” The SC now thinks that he is winning in the game of Words, Numbers, and Law and will repeat himself and change a few words convinced that the correct combination of “magic words” is how he’ll get out of this. “I refuse to recognize the validity of this court as this is an admiralty court as proven by the flag in use. Further, I move to dismiss as jurisdiction has not been established pursuant to the 14th Amendment and declare that this court expunge the record of my arrest as a non-commercial-entity as it regards the 1933 Commercial Act.”

As you can tell.... rational, procedural language requesting a semi-rational, procedural response. Wild, nonsense, faux-legal sounding gibberish response. Creates a problem. It is like someone who learns how to lawyer exclusively by watching Law & Order and is then upset by procedure, paperwork, and reality.

IN SHORT: No wonder he felt that he could storm a government office and act like such an asshole.
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Tee hee, this entry seems like a looping musical number.

Mention Item 1
Mention Item 2
Re-visit Item 1
Re-visit Item 2

Because I’m going to re-visit another thing I wrote about earlier.

Note Leaving. I find that the leaving of notes is not only an excellent way to stay engaged on Prosebox generally; it is a wonderful way to engage Prosebox specifically. That statement feels about as clear as mud. Let me go into some detail.

Notes, generally, are an excellent way to engage in Prosebox even if one does not find that they wish to write entries prolifically or publicly. By reading and noting, it still makes a person an active and often appreciated user of Prosebox.

Notes, more specifically, are an excellent way to personalize the Prosebox experience. If there is a person that you enjoy reading, note them. It can lead to discussions, a mutual understanding or respect, or any number of different interactions. If there is a person that you enjoy reading and want them to read you: note them! It can create a much better experience for both individuals that way!

Thus why my current note-funk brings a further level of unfortunateness. I have read a number of interesting people of late. But… can’t find myself really saying anything worthwhile. Or much at all really. I read someone, think “What a clever insight.” go to the notes and then.... shrug and move the cursor to the small x on the top right of the screen. Ultimately, this could mean nothing… just me being lazy, or distracted, or disinterested… but I do wonder if it may be indicative of something else.
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Out of nowhere, I find myself thinking about the TV Shows I watched religiously in the 1990s. Now, remember… I was born in 1984… so keep that in mind.
Boy Meets World
Saved by the Bell
Spin City
Friends
Frasier
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Caroline in the City

… seems like a strange list.
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Here’s another fun random comment…
it surprises me, but only slightly, that I don’t live on the West Coast.

Granted, when I was an actor… the West Coast was a foregone conclusion. Silly, I know. But visit San Diego, San Francisco, Haystack, Newport, Westport, Tacoma, Seattle… all beautiful seaside areas. Sometimes I close my eyes and just… imagine myself spending a day at one of those beaches, hiking along the shoreline or casting a line off and being at sea for a day. Sleeping on a boat or just relaxing with a drink.... I know I’ll never have enough money, enough support, enough physical health… but it is kind of a secret dream of mine to retire to a House Boat at some time. Putter up and down the west coast enjoying some well deserved rest. Never happen; but an interesting dream.
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stargazing April 24, 2019

I haven't been noting much either.

Park Row Fallout stargazing ⋅ April 25, 2019

Apparently, this is something people are seeing all over. I wonder if it is the weather or the change in Season or if people are just feeling... fatigued?

stargazing Park Row Fallout ⋅ April 25, 2019

I'm just super depressed. No one needs to see that.

Park Row Fallout stargazing ⋅ April 25, 2019

Well... whether they need to see it or not, I hope you aren't bottling it up. Digital Hug To You!!

stargazing Park Row Fallout ⋅ April 25, 2019

Thanks. I write every day, tho it doesn't seem to be helping like it used to.

Jafael April 24, 2019

I find that very few people are noting entries anymore. The problem with that is when people stop getting notes, they stop writing entries. At least I do. I find myself thinking of entries to write, but then I don't because "no one is reading anyway." There is no way to know things are being read at all if there are no notes. Then it just feels like screaming into the void, rather than a community, and what fun is that?

Park Row Fallout Jafael ⋅ April 25, 2019

That's a shame... because I entirely agree with you! This is a great community and when it feels like it is growing quiet, that is too bad. I'm wondering if it is the change of season, or weather, or fatigue, or people being busy?? Hope for all of us that it is short term.

Jafael Park Row Fallout ⋅ April 25, 2019

So you are finding it is growing quieter, also? I often tend to wonder if I'm just imagining it!

Amaryllis April 25, 2019 (edited April 25, 2019)

Edited

I'm here but have nothing to say. In the spirit of your entry, here is a note.

Park Row Fallout Amaryllis ⋅ April 25, 2019

:) Thanks for the note! Hope things are well with you.

Down the rabbit hole... April 25, 2019 (edited April 25, 2019)

Edited

I haven't been noting much or writing much for that matter.

Purple Dawn April 26, 2019

Now I feel like noting ;) Take care,

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