good days & curiosities in 2019

March 14, 2018 - 11:38am

I am feeling good today. 😁

I’m looking good in my dark teal high necked blouse. I have an ugly, but passable, French braid I just put into my hair. The sun is shining so brightly. I’ve had enough of a break from the chaos of work that I finally feel like I can breathe again!

I’m excited for the weekend even if I don’t have any plans yet. It’s supposed to be high 70s on St. Patrick’s Day Sunday! My plan is to bake this chocolate Guinness cake I found a recipe for in a magazine and probably share it with the neighbours. I’m hoping they’ll be around because that would be a lot of fun.

I think I’m just excited for Spring time in general. The flowers are starting to bloom. The sun is out again [though I’m so grateful for the rain we’ve had this year!! and might continue to get next week.]

JR just stopped by the office with a box of what I assumed to be paperwork. Turns out he brought me his company jacket, which he’d mentioned to me months ago. Also some neat little gifts from Hawaii - a coffee mug, shot glass, and bottle opener. haha. He must know me pretty well. 😉
It’s his birthday today so I told him that I thought we were doing something backwards here. He said it’s fine because mine’s in like 60 days. haha. And of course I made a jab about how he forgot my birthday last year anyway. 😛 I can’t help myself! He’s sick though so I didn’t even give him a hug which felt kinda weird but oh well.

Now I’m even more excited about today. haha. Who doesn’t love gifts!? 😃

Plus later tonight I’m supposed to go over to the neighbour’s house. Shocker! hah. But it’s not really for hang out time though I won’t say no if they offer cerveza. Last night L asked if I can help her with a cover letter. She’s applying to a job here in town and I guess the cover letter is required. I told her that I honestly don’t have any experience with cover letters, but I’m still willing to help with what I can. I’m a great proofreader and I guess my unsolicited advice on her resume the other day went over well. ha. I told her not to pay too much attention to what I have to say, but it might have been earlier that day that my mom also told them I graduated with honors and had my face on a billboard so who knows what she’s thinking about my intelligence. haha 🤷‍♀️

We’ll see what we come up with. I’m excellent at online research and I can BS my way through just about anything [including an essay to get my face on a billboard 😆]

So I just went down a rabbit hole in search of that essay because we’ve been mentioning it off/on and I can’t for the life of me remember what it is that I wrote. I definitely know that I bs-ed my way through it. I’ve always been good at procrastinating and working well under pressure at the last minute. The words just fly out of me and apparently are good enough to catch someone’s attention. Or my competition was light....or non-existent. haha!

I did eventually find the essay, but I haven’t had a chance to read it yet.

3.15.19 - 4:09pm

I tried to restart this entry around 11 this morning and then completely forgot. It really has been such a weird season.

I’m happy it’s Friday though. I am ready to go home and veg out for a while. Of course I still have to come in all day tomorrow but it’s not so bad. Counting down the weeks - without actually trying to count them down because I’ll get stressed out. hah.

Ugh. I am so not able to focus on this right now. Basically I’ll give a quick spiel about yesterday and move on.

So I went down that rabbit hole. Got distracted when I ran across a folder containing old notifications from coffeeguy. Oh man that was so long ago! But I think about him from time to time. I wonder what he’s up to but I haven’t gone so far as to search for him. I’m sure it would be easy enough to find him online with the unique last name he has but I don’t know. It’s probably not a smart move. I really enjoyed talking to him. I was so young though! And dumb. I wasn’t confident in my own skin back then. Didn’t know who I was or what I was all about. It’s interesting to see the differences compared to now. I skimmed what little I could see of the messages [some of that stuff was from myspace OMG] and it’s funny because we had the same kind of back and forth that I have now with the neighbours and compa. Sometimes I forget how much I miss being able to be myself.

Quick sidenote: The Client came into the office on Tuesday to get some work done. I think I’d just mentioned out loud that morning that I hadn’t heard from him and he would text when he needed something. Sure enough. So he showed up while I was on the phone with Tony. We were wrapping up the “work” call. Laughing and joking about Cancun and other random things. Not sure if the Client was listening since he immediately got on his phone but he was weird that day. I hate that I notice these things but he repeated the same story like a hundred times. I felt kind of uncomfortable with him sitting there. Not even sure how to explain it. But I just wanted to focus on the work and get him out.
I mean part of it was because I was tired but just I don’t know. Some day I’ll put more thought into it. I remember consciously thinking about how I felt like I couldn’t be myself at all. Like I was making my typical sarcastic jokes and they were bombing. Sure I have a pretty funky sense of humor, I’ll admit that. It’s just that I would say something and immediately regret it. Knowing I was with the wrong audience. That’s definitely not something I can do long term. The guy’s cool enough but I honestly don’t know how much more time I want to spend with him. Especially when he doesn’t let me speak and then if I get a word in he sh*ts on my stories. Ok dude. I’m not sure why he doesn’t seem to see that we’re so different. Oh and don’t even get me started on the fb comments that pop up in my newsfeed from him replying to public threads. Ugh the ignorance/insensitivity/close-minded view of the world. No thanks.

Anyway, I had to mention that real quick. Basically I’m still debating on the idea of getting back in touch with coffeeguy some day. I guess it’s my curiosity. Wondering what it would be like to have a conversation with him as an adult. As the girl I am now! I know for sure we’d get along. My real problem/hesitation is this weird notion that maybe I’d hurt him by getting back in touch. I’m pretty sure he wanted to date me back then and I avoided like I always do. It’s a bummer but I definitely would not want to hurt him in any way. Boy do I miss that motorcycle though. 😏

Also, when I got to work yesterday morning I saw this boat being pulled by a pickup truck in the parking lot and I immediately remembered that I’d had a dream about the Sheriff that night. [Gosh I think I’ve mentioned everyone with a nickname in this entry haha] I don’t remember anything about the dream but it was just that feeling you get. You know the one? Where you just know you’ve been close to this person. They’ve been in your thoughts or whatever. I wish I could remember something about it. Oh well. Apparently the boat triggered the memory of the dream. I’m so curious to find out if he’s going to show up again this year. An in-person meeting? Phone calls? Nothing at all??

Maybe I should become the cat lady. Curiosity is totally my kryptonite . 😂

Alright. I have so many other things I want to say and I’m semi on a roll now but this entry is long and I probably shouldn’t continue it forever. Perhaps I’ll start clicking away on another one while I have the time and motivation. We’ll see…

rose.
10:16pm