I Dont Know What to Do in Things I Write When Im Sad

I literally dont know what to do
Why am I so happy that someone said they’re proud of me
Why does it make me so happy and why asn’t it happened before
Why can someone Ive known for four months make me feel better than someone who raised me
Why am I so fucking self-depreciating that one person makes me so unbelievably happy
Thank god for kind professor
Thank god for new friends
Thank god for my new home
And if there is no god thank whoever the hell is out there for sending me somewhere I could be saved