Headaches in Book Six: Trying to Hold On 2019

  • Feb. 11, 2019, 4:05 p.m.
  • |
  • Public

Weekend came and went. A brief discussion of those events:

FRIDAY
Got home from a rough day of work. Started to tell Wife about it but it was WAY too much for her to handle. That isn’t a criticism. Some days, the shit I see in this job is not fit for most people. Friday was simply one of those days. Most people don’t want to hear their spouse recount trying to prove sadistic child abuse. We went to the basement to review plans for our surround sound. Wife is finally in agreement with me about speaker placement; but she was having a really difficult time communicating something to me. It became an argument that then became Wife exploding. But because I’m in such a better place regarding just about everything… I was able to take it in stride. Wife was not “freaking the fuck out on me”… she was having difficulty expressing herself so she was getting frustrated at herself, frustrated at the situation, and frustrated at me… all of that frustration combines and comes out as explosive energy. I gave her an hour, apologized for pushing her to that point and she apologized for getting to that point. And we discussed what happened. Unlike previous times where that has happened, we were able to come together and handle this like adults. A good step forward.

SATURDAY
Before driving to Couple’s Counseling, Wife looked at my car and was aghast at my tires. CLEARLY something is wrong because my tires seem incapable of holding air in them. We agreed that I would drive her car to work and she would take my car to the shop. Then we drove to Couple’s Counseling. I don’t know what was going on… usually, if we leave by 10 a.m. we get to the Counselor on time around 11… but the traffic was abysmal. We were 15 minutes late. Luckily, I contacted the therapist to let her know we would be late but… even with something out of our hands like that, I’m never fond of being tardy. Counseling was okay. I have to agree with the counselor on what Saturday was. I’m so quick to try to fix, maintain, work that I don’t ever sit, be still, and appreciate progress. Wife and I had sex. Wife and I did a few dates. This is something to sit with, appreciate, then discuss how we can make this sustainable and repeatable. She’s right. But… it is me. Hooray, I had sex… if we keep up this pattern, I’ll be up to sex twice a year! So… it was good to sit, appreciate, and encourage. But then we got into “So, why was it that ‘the dam burst’?” To which Wife simply said… that morning it felt like a sore muscle relaxed, so she went with it. But.... that explanation screams unsustainable. Because it isn’t something she did, isn’t something she chose, isn’t something that can be discussed… just this ethereal, ephemeral “because”. So… something to pay attention to.

After counseling, we went to Best Buy to pick up speaker stands. We also treated ourselves to some fast food because we honestly don’t eat that stuff much anymore at all. Then drove back home. Wife continued listening to her podcast, I played video games. Wife is starting to take exception to me playing video games. Frankly, I do totally see her side of things. She feels cooped up in the house, when I come home from work, she wants to spend time with me. But, I’m not sure if she really sees my side of things. I’m up to my neck in “the weight of reality” every day… abused dogs, abused children, criminals, and victims… the horrors of Global Geo-Politics and the chicanery of local politics… that is my everyday… so when I come home, I’d significantly like to detach from reality a bit. I don’t want to sit with my Wife watching television (especially reality tv). I don’t want to see “Pitbulls and Parolees” or “Say Yes to the Dress” or “Doctor Pimple Popper” or “Botched” or all this reality T.V. crap she’s super into. I want to watch Cartoons (of any kind), Jeopardy, Comedians Discussing the News (the only way I can keep Wife up-to-date on recent news), or I want to play video games where I feel like (1) I’m doing impossible things for righteous causes; (2) I’m quickly and easily ticking things off of a virtual To Do list.

This has all become much more of a problem since I decided to stop drinking until March. With the alcohol, I was able to detach from reality via chemically enhanced mental state and allowed me to sit through “Botched” and the various medical Reality TV programs my wife enjoys. Without such “medication”… I go from “Reality of Lawlessness and Abuse” to “Reality TV of Medical Malpractice and Bad Decisions.” Though, speaking of the alcohol thing… something else to bring up about Saturday. I was really wanting a drink. Wife told me that “Sure, you’ve gone a whole week. If you actually had a serious problem, I don’t think you would have made it this far. One drink should be fine.” I disagreed. Granted, going a week without thinking “I need a drink” does prove that I’m not irredeemable. But if I gave in after 1 week; that would still mean I had a problem… albeit a manageable one. AND… I’ve known I have a manageable problem. I come from two separate families of High Functioning Alcoholics. My people would have watched Mad Men and scoffed at them as teetotalers. So despite really, honestly and truly wanting a drink on Saturday… I’ve remained sober. This is something I used to do all the time. After turning 21 and starting to drink, I used to dedicate at least 1 month or more a year to being sober… to make sure I could do it… to prove that I was still in control. I haven’t done this in several years. I’ll admit it is because I wasn’t strong enough. 2014 to 2018 were not great for personal strength or positive conditions. So I wanted to do it this year… where things were getting better. Get back on track. So yes… there will likely be many times this month where I think, “I’d really like a drink”… but if I can go the whole month sober? I’ll be the better for it.

Saturday Night was also the premiere of Sword Art Online: Alicization on Toonami. I had set my DVR to record but it only got 30 minutes of what turned out to be a 1 hour premiere. CURSES! I’ll have to look it up somewhere to watch it. Not that I should have DVR’d it in the first place. Wife and I went to bed on Saturday and I fell asleep… for about 43 minutes. Then I woke up and just… itchy, sore, uncomfortable… could not get back to bed. I tried stretching, tiger balm, floor roller… nothing worked. After several hours, I figured… fuck this.. and went downstairs to game. If I’m not going to be able to sleep, at least I can keep checking things off my virtual To Do List. At around 3:45 a.m., I finally started to feel sleepy. I went back upstairs and, key thing I think, instead of disrobing (as I typically sleep nude) I kept everything on. Socks, sweat pants, sweatshirt… and bundled up with three extra blankets. That was enough to get me to sleep. I awoke at noon on Sunday.

SUNDAY
Upon waking, I quickly noticed that Wife’s pillow was missing. Which meant that sometime between 4 a.m. and whenever she decided to get up for the day… she had woken, was bothered by my snoring, and relocated to the guestroom. I finally left bed at 1:15 p.m. and Wife was listening to her Magnus Archives podcast. I made some food… watched some TV… and as she continued with her podcast, I figured… screw it, I can fit in some video game time. I did encourage her to feel free to listen to her podcast downstairs. If she wanted to spend time together while we did things separately (which she tends to count towards quality time) I thought it was a good compromise. But, and she isn’t wrong, Wife mentioned that the basement was a very cold place indeed. It is. For a normal human woman, the basement is probably a good ten degrees too cold for consistent comfort right now. That being said, there is a giant fuzzy blanket down there for her as well as a gas fireplace. I started up my game. A few hours later, Wife came down and started tidying up bits of the basement and contemplating how to do the speakers on the speaker stands. For dinner, I proposed helping her with something she mentioned during counseling. She mentioned that the worst part of her Stir Crazy Cooped Up Feeling was that she lacked structure. I chimed in offering to help because I remember VERY WELL what that was like! Remember when I was studying for the bar??? I had “all day” to accomplish “whatever I wanted” so I needed to learn and enforce structure to make sure I get “what needed to be done” finished. So, she and I wrote up a bit of a schedule for her for the week but (honestly) I don’t have high hopes. For the Bar… I had a deadline and required expectations. I needed to finish studying Subject A by Deadline A. Wife has some of that… but she isn’t as engaged. Like… I’m trying to use the house and the dog as stick and carrot for that. Finish House by Mid Spring to Get Dog. But her engagement level with… just everything… is lacking. I asked “What do you want to accomplish this week?” She had no idea. She couldn’t articulate “Do laundry” or “Set up Remaining Guest Room” or “Clear E-Mail” or “Learn Chemehuevi.” So I filled in some things for her (like Take Car to Shop; Fix Bedframe; Finish Surround Sound Calibration” and I just hope that helps. I DID put down “Play Video Games with Husband” because… frankly… I’m not video gaming to “preserve alone time.” I would love if Wife video gamed with me. Honestly. Hell, often times I need her to because so many games are built for multiplayer these days. And while she was super into the Halo Series when we first got married… like everything else from those days, that is gone now. Another thing that surprises and worries me about Wife. I went from a Dancing, Martial Arts Enthusiast That Plays Halo and Enjoys Physical Contact to… current Wife. We’ll see what happens. If she is unwilling to play, I could set up a “dummy” 2nd Player to do things with. Wouldn’t be as much fun obviously.
alt text

I won’t go into too many details about today. I went to the ENT. My nose is all fucked up. I have a cyst on one side, a sympathetic pustule on the other. That is likely causing all the bleeding. As to Wife’s assertion that I have a deviated septum? Oh… it’s deviated all right. It also isn’t deviated in a “off to the side” way. It is a crooked, jagged line leaning more and more to one side. ENT didn’t mention surgery YET as a Deviated Septum is not by itself a health risk. He’s recommended treatment for the cyst and pustule and is scheduling a sleep study to determine how bad my Nocturnal Breathing (and Not Breathing) really are. THEN we’ll discuss our options going forward.

As I drove to work after that, the weather reports were freaking out again. Winter Weather Advisory in my area from 3 p.m. Monday to 6 p.m. Tuesday. Expected snow to be between 5 to 7 inches. Massive blowing causing likely white out conditions on the roads. SO OF COURSE, everyone and everything is trying to cancel things left and right. This is SUCH a different world than were I grew up. I grew up in West Des Moines during (and this is 100% true) the period where a genuine INUIT was Superintendent of Schools. Our snow days required more than a foot of snow and our “cold days” were only allowed if we were expecting consistent days of sub zero weather. Now… the school district presently runs with a little more caution and in rural Iowa, I understand the further need for additional caution. I just… deeply recognize the difference. I simply hope that my own travels remain safe as “icy or snowy” doesn’t bother me but when the wind kicks up that snow and creates white out? THAT bothers me.
alt text

One Work Complaint that I have… that I can’t quite let go of… is the Vigilante Victim. I appreciate if something bad happened to you. It is my job to attempt to force some measure of accountability. However, my job is uniquely and intentionally devoid of emotion so that I don’t let my judgment get clouded. FOR EXAMPLE… if you’re so pissed at someone that you want them to be charged with 243 crimes… but I can only reasonably prove 6… I’m only going to charge 6. If reasonable proof gives me 6 but proof beyond a shadow of a doubt only gets me 4… I’ll charge 6 crimes, and call it a good day if I can get at least 4 convictions. That’s my job. To me… I’ve taken someone with ZERO convictions and held him accountable to (between) 4 to 6 crimes. The Vigilante Victim, on the other hand, sees it as the person getting away with 237 crimes scottfree! They don’t take into consideration things like (1) the law; (2) jurisprudence; (3) legal ethics; or (4) burden of proof. All they know is that they were the victim of a bad person, that bad person needs to pay, and that bad person can never pay enough. This becomes uniquely and problematically awful when the victim begins tailing their abuser. Video Recording anything that may be an infraction of probation. Going out of their way, living their life, so that they can ruin their abuser’s existence. In the case I am presently speaking about.... I get it. You were with your abuser for 7 years. The State tried to intervene and help on multiple previous occasions. You changed your story and disrupted prosecution over and over again. Now that he’s finally done “enough” to get you to leave him and truly assist the prosecution… you wish that you could go back and undo all the previous interference and make him pay for all the times he hurt you. THE LAW DOES NOT WORK THAT WAY and for good reason. After a case is dismissed because the victim throws a giant wrench into the works… we can’t resurrect that case 5 years later because now the victim is mad enough to do something. The Law deals with facts and proof; not emotions and vindictiveness.

In truth, and this upsets people, I do not see my job as “Hurting bad people.” That isn’t what I do and that certainly isn’t what I consider justice. My job is to “Hold people accountable when they break the law, protect children and victims, and protect Society from unlawful behavior and policy.” So… if someone is beating up their girlfriend? I need to hold that person accountable, help the victim get counseling or financial support if any is needed, and make sure that the legal rights of the victim and defendant are being respected. THAT is my job. It is not, “To hurt that guy as much as the law will allow.”
alt text
Now, let’s look in on FACEBOOK to see what things are “trending” there between Centerists, Trumpists, and Liberals.

MY STATEMENTS today

(1) Over the weekend, The President tweeted something that has been characterized as a “joke” where the punchline is The Trail of Tears. His defenders have stood up for him, claiming that THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES “was unaware of the Trail of Tears” at all.
We have reached a chilling moment in history where people wish to see THEIR LEADER as so blameless, that they would rather characterize him as woefully unintelligent and uneducated WHILE arguing that he is “Ordained by God” to lead.
(1 RE:) This is just… the type of mental gymnastics people do to justify their absolute WORSHIP of the Orange Asshole is.... terrifying!! “President Trump is a genius. He’s the only one who can save this country! He speaks the truth!” and yet “President Trump has no idea what that meant. He doesn’t have to know what’s going on all the time. He didn’t mean it like he said it.” THIS is a reason for the polarization. Because, let’s face it… under George W Bush… even when you agreed with him you could say, “Well, that was a stupid thing to say.” NO MORE. Now whatever Trump says or does must be worshiped, adored, and defended. It is fucking ridiculous.

(2) Life is full of ethical predicaments and contrary philosophy.
We tell people “always be yourself” but then we tell people “growth and change are important.” We tell people “Always stick up for what you believe in, no matter what anybody says” but then we tell people “Stop being stubborn when you’re wrong.”
The truth is… we’ve created a dichotomy of philosophy. Is it strong to be bullheaded and stick to your guns? Is it better to be flexible and open to other ideas? The honesty is… all have their place. But we don’t teach nuance or show appreciation to the complex realities of life. We would call Anti-Vaxers fools for not trusting science; but aren’t they (dangerously) just “standing up for what they believe in” which is a value universally encouraged? We would say Trump Supporters are “blindly following a destructive pied piper” but then encourage loyalty, civic duty, and devotion to a cause.

The truth is… I blame much of our country’s rising divisiveness on the death of the nuance, the end of complex thought and discussion. When we only wish for the simple, The Simple win.

(2 RE:) Not sure if people will understand, agree, or comment. But it seems to me this has become a huge nightmare problem for the country. Guess what… I can be FOR the 2nd Amendment and AGAINST School Shootings… I can be FOR pro-choice and AGAINST free abortions for all… I can be FOR Immigration Reform and Border Security and AGAINST Building a Wall. This stupid bullshit idea that Tribalism is a requirement to govern is what has landed us with one of the worst governments to ever be in power in the United States. It is an honest and genuine issue! And I’m not blaming this but I’m certainly saying it hasn’t helped.... to Evangelical Southern Christians: You can be a faithful Christian and still believe in Science and still believe that “sinners” should be treated like people (because, guess what… we’re all sinners). To Intellectual Elite Atheists: You can defend your beliefs and perspective and not be a terrible person that condescends about faith or family values. The more we willingly pigeonhole ourselves and try to BECOME the stereotypes of our labels… the worse life becomes for all. If we could all be open and accepted for our apparent contradictions, we’d all be more honest and complete people.

TRUMPIST COUSIN STATEMENTS today

(1) My Trumpist Cousin has shared a video “exposing Nancy Pelosi” to secretly be against Medicare for all.

(1 RE:) This is the kind of shit he does that I just do not fucking understand. (Despite the fact that he and his family would benefit from smarter Health Care) He has been rallying against Medicare for all since Barack Obama became President! It is a prime platform stance. So why would he attack an “enemy liberal” for apparently supporting his own agenda?! This is the ridiculous and stupid that happens when you don’t use your mind in addressing life issues. If my enemy is in power, but my enemy supports my position, I should allow my enemy to continue (smart). If my enemy is in power, but my enemy supports my position, I should expose my enemy so that her own people defeat her (dumb.) The reason I characterize it that way and push back so hard against that? Because it is the destructive politics we’ve been seeing all over the country. GONE is “getting things done” because PRESENT is “destroying my enemy.” The funny thing is.... Trumpists are screaming that the Democrats “started it” by investigating Trump. First of all, that wildly ignores the 5 year investigation into Benghazi… but sure, let’s have zero historical reference. Let’s discuss it in terms of present tense. The Democrats are looking into genuine allegations of criminal conduct that could threaten our nation. Meanwhile, the Trump White House is so obsessed with “destroying anyone that doesn’t blindly follow Trump” that the Trump Administration has seen more turnover in their first 2 years than some presidencies see EVER. The Trump Strategy is “destroy” not “govern” or even “think.”

(2) alt text

(2RE:) Does this idiot even understand what the implication is?! Buffalo Bill was not the hero of this movie. This was the guy that was kidnapping women, torturing them, killing them, then turning their skin into “an outfit.” “It puts the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again.” is a line that depicts (1) Bill dehumanized his victims, (2) had a very narrow and sinister goal, and (3) handled disobedience like a spoiled child. SO YES.... it IS the President… who has dehumanized the ENTIRE non-white world; has a very narrow and sinister goal; and handles disobedience like a spoiled child. AND YET my Trumpian Cousin shared this as a means of SUPPORT for the Wall. Granted, this Cousin has zero respect for women and hates all immigrants… which begs the observation… many Trump Supporters when interviewed say that they support Donald Trump so much because, “He hates the things I hate.”

(3) alt text

(3 RE:) I’ll admit, I was one who struggled with the Minimum Wage issue for quite a long time. Should it be higher? How high? And I was a guy that argued with someone because of my own pay. I was busting my ass, putting myself in dangerous conditions, WITH a law degree… and I was making $10.00 an hour. So I flipped a little and said, “Why should someone who doesn’t even need a GED make more money than I do?!” The response was “A rising tide raises all ships” and I said bullshit. Frankly, I still say that specific argument is bullshit. People will always pay “the least they can for the most work.” Ultimately, my primary concern about increasing wages? Inflation. If the minimum wage is (random number) 6% higher than current average base pay? Expect everything to cost 6% more. WHAT ULTIMATELY CONVINCED ME to be pro-wage increases? The hard numbers. Sure, we can say that we’re worried about the inflation that would come with a rise in wages… but as there hasn’t been a rise in wages of significance for a long time… what, then, do we attribute THOSE rising prices to?? Rent increased (in some areas) over 1,000% since the last wage hike. This is what is causing the needed discussion about wages… the idea that working a full time job is not enough to live on. AND HONESTLY, passionately and sincerely, if you are someone that says “Working a full time job shouldn’t guarantee a place to live or food to eat” than what kind of jackass are you? You honestly believe any job should be able to say, “We’re going to demand the lion’s share of your productive time and reward you with less than you need to function properly.” Not only is that inhumane and monstrous; it is bad business. Workers that are taken care of are better workers. If your employees don’t need to worry about where their next meal is coming from; they can focus on their job. If your employees don’t need to worry about working three jobs to pay rent; they can perform their ONE JOB better. Treating employees like people (and paying them as such) is humane AND Good Business. But no, my Cousin who works Construction thinks a higher minimum wage will “threaten all ‘legitimate’ blue collar work.”

(4) alt text
The accompanying texts were “4 More Years!” and “Ordained by God!” and “Fuck the Fake Media!”

(4 RE:) This… is how media and a refusal to be dispassionate can destroy far too much. People are genuinely and unflappably accepting everything Donald Trump tells them. “Miracle in our Economy” and they lap it up. Never mind that thousands of different metrics are saying we’re close to 1920s era danger with a recession around the corner… one that is almost CERTAIN to happen with another government shut down. No New Wars? That is a bit of an issue… Trump has actively pissed off all of our allies while outright sucking up to the biggest enemies of Democracy and Freedom. We haven’t had any new wars because our Allies are hoping Trump is a nightmare we’ll wake up from and our enemies know they can play him. So if “No New Wars” is your desired outcome from “total global fuckery”? Lowest Unemployment… it’s like these people don’t remember what they themselves were saying during Obama. Every time Obama would come out to discuss unemployment rates; the Conservative Pundits would jump on it saying “That doesn’t include people who have not been looking, people who are still on unemployment, etc.” You can’t call bullshit on statistics for Obama, then use those same statistics to support Trump. I get that you don’t understand that but for fuck sake!! But the biggest thing? The thing I’m downright worried about??? That “cut your taxes” line. The Trump Tax Cuts finally went into full affect NOW. That Federal Refund Check you’re supposed to get this year? Economic Experts have said the following three things: (1) Trump’s tax cuts went almost exclusively to the top 1%. Meaning: MOST Americans are not getting a tax cut. (2) Trump’s tax cuts created ZERO NEW JOBS, despite being made with the promise that they will create new jobs. Almost all of the “new money” went into buying back stocks; rewarding Wall Street at the expense of the average American. (3) At no point was there genuine discussion about how the tax cuts would be paid for. However, Paul Ryan did say that it would likely be paid for “over time” through “the regular tax mechanics” on the regular people. SO… yeah. Since Trump keeps saying he’s responsible for an “Economic Miracle” and is super proud of his “Tax Cuts” go ahead and keep thinking that applies to you, Blue Collar Trump Supporter. I just hope you can wake up from your cult-like hypnosis when you discover that everything Trump did was to aid himself and his investor friends… not you.

LIBERAL STATEMENTS today

(1) alt text

(1 RE:) Sharing for a few reasons. First, if it was such an easy thing to do… why did Trump immediately call for a vindictive and harsh reprisal demanding that “the leaker” be found and punished immediately? Second, if the President’s schedule is “no big deal” then why does Trump feel the need to so passionately defend himself? If you’re actually doing your job your work should speak for itself? Third, if “executive time” was shorthand for “getting work done” why have past President’s Schedules (y’know) actually HAD THINGS IN THEM? Fourth, considering the fact that Trump has been getting to the office later and later of late… does he believe we aren’t aware of his movements? He does know that he’s a man fairly well KNOWN (by his own bragging) to spend most of his time watching television. Finally, this is just a Trump Thing that bothers me… Trump must leap on every exaggeration, every hyperbole, and every stretching of the truth… and most say that he DOES actually believe his own bullshit. SO… Trump honestly believes that he is the hardest working President ever. More so than George Washington (forget that whole… founding a new nation thing)… more so than Abraham Lincoln (forget that whole… civil war thing)… more so than Woodrow Wilson (forget that whole… World War 1 thing)… more so than Franklin Roosevelt (forget that whole… World War 2 thing)… more so than John F. Kennedy (forget that whole… Soviet Union/13 Days issue). No. Trump, delusional, narcissistic, mentally ill Trump genuinely believes he has worked more hours than any past president.

(2) alt text

(2 RE:) Here’s the funny thing… I’m not a fan of AOC’s politics. I think a lot of what she suggests are great new ideas that something DIFFERENT can/should branch out of. She’s a good starting point, but a little too extreme in some of her thinking to be effective in the United States Senate. That being said, she is DYNAMITE at throwing proper levels of shade to the areas where our government is broke as fuck. The truth is… our government is broke as fuck in some SERIOUS places. Here’s my favorite: Pretend I am someone who makes $10 million from the Lumber Industry. My business is clear cutting Forests and business is good!! If I were to give a senator a briefcase with 3 million dollars in exchange for a promise to vote against EPA Bills regulating clear cutting… that is a bribe and it is highly illegal. BUT if I give his campaign 3 million dollars and encourage him to vote against EPA bills regulating clear cutting… that is totally acceptable. Legitimate foul, fucked up example happening in Iowa: NON-FDA Approved Supplements… have funneled almost a billion dollars into Chuck Grassley since the 1980s. In exchange, he has consistently voted to not regulate Non-FDA Approved Supplements. Totally legal and, whenever asked, Mr. Grassley is offended and outraged at the implication that he could be in any way swayed by political contributions. Yeah, buddy. Weeeee believe you. Ass.

(3) alt text

(3 RE:) Tomi Lahren is a cancer and I don’t say that lightly. FIRST OF ALL, almost every expert in the field of border security says that a wall is the least important part of the Border Security funding they need. What they need most? Technology. IMAGINE THAT! In 2019, in a world where a high powered surveillance drone can be purchased as a child’s toy… experts suggest that upgrading our flagging and older technology to at least be on par with what can be easily picked up from a hobbyist shop might be A BETTER USE OF OUR RESOURCES?! Yeah. Duh! But it isn’t what the Right Wing Pundits have been screeching for over the last 15 years. So… “border agents want a wall” is a stupid thing to say… ICE wants a wall… because ICE has enjoyed unparalleled funding from Trump… so it is very much “You pay us more, we’ll scratch your back!” LOOK TO NON-BIASED EXPERTS. Which is exactly the point in Climate Change and Gun Debates. The scientists saying “No climate change at all” were often being paid by Exxon, Enron, and other energy affiliates. The “Yeah, we’ve noticed something that we’re worried about” scientists were geologists, meteorologists, and individuals publishing to scientific journals… not creating for-profit, to-lobbyist reports. And the gun issue? Medical Doctors are discussing what they are seeing in their emergency rooms. Doctors would make, arguably, more money by continuing to receive patients and taking NRA lobbying money. But so far, most haven’t. Most have come out to say, “This is a problem.”

(4) alt text

(4 RE:) Genuinely, this is what I’ve been thinking for a while. Like… don’t celebrate rape, aid in rape prevention, don’t preach hate based on race or religion, literally just live and let live for a fucking minute..... but nope… I GENUINELY SAW someone bitching that “Wolfenstein” was an “Anti-MAGA game that needs to keep it’s libtard politics to itself and not ruin gaming.” A Trump Supporter was ragging on a game ABOUT NAZIS for being “too political”. We have honestly, terrifying, frustratingly entered a version of the world where people are saying, “Stop being mean to Nazis. I identify as a Nazi and that is a valid political identity.”

alt text

With that, I’ll wrap this up. The snow has started and… while I wanted to do a lot more reading and commenting and interacting with the News and Prosebox today… it was a Juvenile Court Day… so it was busy. I’ll catch up on all of that later, maybe tomorrow, hopefully.

Will also respond to notes tonight/tomorrow. Love, kisses, hugs, dirty innuendo, polite handshake, respectful bow, or cool-dude nod to you all!


stargazing February 11, 2019

The benchmark for whether you have an alcohol problem shouldn't be can I stop drinking for a month, but rather, when I drink, do I always or almost always drink to excess? Can you have just one drink? There are plenty of people who are able to stop drinking for a periods of time, but who binge regularly. They would still be considered to have a problem with alcohol.

Park Row Fallout stargazing ⋅ February 13, 2019

This is well said. And I can have a single alcoholic drink if I chose. However, my underlying problem is... I'm a bottomless pit for liquids. Whether water, juice, soda, alcohol, anything.... I could drink gallons and gallons and still be thirsty. It is something we've been especially cognizant of since the fact that I am like that and don't have diabetes seems odd. So I suppose another reason to do a month without alcohol is to "gorge" on liquids that aren't as inherently dangerous to liver function and brain cells. :p :)

stargazing Park Row Fallout ⋅ February 13, 2019

I'm the same way. I drink 3 liters of water a day, and it never seems to be enough. So far, not diabetic.

Tempestuous1 February 12, 2019

I love reading your political "rants", if you can call them that. :) I would reply more, but 1. I am tired and it is nearly 5am and I've been up since 3am, and 2. My phone's battery is about to die.
I totally get what you're saying about wanting some type of escape when you get home. Be safe in this crazy weather÷ :)

Park Row Fallout Tempestuous1 ⋅ February 13, 2019

:) No worries, thanks!
Hopefully, my political rants come across as thoughtful and reflective (if at times emotional and exasperated). We're just... we're living in a time of such information and technological advancement and yet... those in power and those supporting them seem to celebrate in ignorance and hold "lack of nuance" and "absence of critical thought" as virtues. It is... unsettling.

You must be logged in to comment. Please sign in or join Prosebox to leave a comment.