Just another day in My Thoughts

It’s been a rough week this week; I went from being surrounded by people all week long to being by myself in the office in that is always tough. I miss being around people being alone in the office presses me, and I expressed that depression through eating. It was not a good week for the diet, after coming back from a conference where I maintained my weight, I put on 3 pounds this week while sitting here by myself.

I’m looking forward to my partner getting back today and my life getting back to normal.

There are some positive aspects to this week, the video selection section of the website is working very well. I’ve already had three companies submit video change requests, and for the most part, it went off without a hitch. These days I’m happy when something that involves the Internet goes well or at least as planned. Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and today were very active days, and I got a lot of work done, Wednesday was kind of a wash having a hard time keeping myself motivated to work. I feel kind of bad about that since I didn’t give it my all buy those days happen sometimes. I have a little work left from the meeting, especially the creation of a document to explain the new video selection site. I’m drawing a blank where to start, and I’m hoping that if I sit on it over the weekend, I can look at it with fresh eyes on Monday.

I’ve started reaching out to people concerning signing up preferred digital signage; I’m so surprised at the number of people who do not respond to my emails at all. S tells me that I shouldn’t worry about it and there as they get to know me they will start responding to them. One part of me understands that another part of me wants to scream in frustration. At times, I feel that I’m in over my head with this job, I’m at a loss which direction to head in and have concerned over asking S. I want him to believe that he made the right choice in hiring me, but I’m not always sure he did. I’m many levels I feel like I’m letting him down, especially with the app in dealing with the website developer. I’ve always had this problem, even in my last job. I’m very insecure in my abilities, and I feel bad shows in the work I do.

I’m thinking of making meringue with my daughter this weekend, it’s something we’ve never tried, and I think we need something to come together in bond. The last several weeks have been very rough on both of us. Between her school assignments in her not eating she has, for the most part, stopped talking to me. I’m hoping that by doing an activity that she’ll enjoy we might bond a little bit. I’m so used to having a positive relationship with my daughter stress is unbearable. The positive side of this is that I have created a stronger bond with my son. We sit and talk every night he shares with me his daily activities, and I make puberty jokes. He keeps telling me how embarrassing I am but then tells me not to stop. He’s a confusing little shit.