1.) No no, it’s not a Cloak of Invisibility, it’s an Invisible Cloak. It won’t make you invisible but it will make you slightly warmer than your enemies suspect.
2.) Fraternity legends speak of the fabled El Dorabro, the Lost City of Kegs.
3.) The ability to lie, yeah, that’s cool, but do you know what’s REALLY cool? The ability to know which truth to tell.
4.) When something’s stupid and you have no way to make it go away, sometimes it is okay to just ignore it. You have no obligation to take on psychic damage for idiocy you 100% cannot prevent.
5.) One of the few fun things about Twitter is referring to Tomi Lahren as “G. Gordon Lady”.
6.) Pantera later tried adding his younger D&D loving cousin Dicebag Darren to the band on electric lute but it just wasn’t the same.
7.) A fundamentalist hipster theocratic state is known as a kaleiphate.
8.) Everything you don’t understand is magic.
9.) I know there’s wizard rock about Harry Potter but is there wizard rap? Can my wizard rap name be Snape-Dogg?
10.) I mean, the BEST way to stop a zombie outbreak is for people to stop dying but no one is looking for OUT OF THE BOX THINKING in movies like that, I guess.
11.) I’ve spent so long telling myself that even saying “it’s okay” is a terrifyingly risky arrogance, the kind of over-blown self-confidence that drives a person mad. I’m trying to get over it and make some peace with myself and that California scar.
12.) A booze for dogs called HOUNDGROG DAY.