Learn something! in Musings

Let me explain to you something… even as a child, playing video games, I never played on Easy mode—I always played on Hard mode. Spider Man vs Kingpin 24-hours you had the choice of 3 lives or 1 life and in the game the opponents were aggressive… I still chose 1 life… cause if I can’t do it the hard way I don’t need to do it at all..

So I bring this up because I have a certain set of clients and I’m an erratic hairstylist, I own the salon… I have one motherfucker, who just graduated beauty school and everytime I was at the salon he was a fucking mosquito on my back… he wanted to learn from me but it wasn’t because he was hungry for to learn talent it was cause he was hungry to get money.

On my schedule about two-three months ago…MY CLIENTS were going to him, but they didn’t go to him because they wanted to but because he’s been marketed by the front desk as my second hand....and I was in the salon for 6-7-8 weeks watching him do my clients… I’m not a jealous bitch, I know that he talks a lot of shit and he deserved them.

Ben told me “oh my god all your clients come to me, I’m so much better than you!” And everyone froze and I just laughed and said “yeah well I taught you well, but you never learned shit from me” and Ben took it as a compliment…I’ve been doing hair for 15 years, I’ve been a published hairstylist; my work has graced some of the most influential covers of the USA, UK and China. I’m indie and commercial, I’ve done things that I still don’t comprehend for Rupauls Drag Race, for Paris Hilton, from Lindsay Lohan to Jane Fonda…

So now Ben thought he was better than me but all of the clients he did for me are coming back to me… “oh I went to Ben but if that’s what 225$ Is I’d rather go to Andy—he’s still 475$ for a partial? Yeah fuck it!”

Bitch you can always one up me… but I’m eternal, I’m not a gimmick, I am a staple for forever, check your fucking self before you come for me…cause you were booked for the time I wasn’t there… but 95% of these girls don’t want to see you anymore or ever…

Just like a Chanel bag l, but he’s that can’t afford me go to cheaper shit, those that can afford me and can’t wait go to the cheaper option… at the end of the day I AM THE MOTHERFUCKING BADDEST BITCH, I AM ETERNAL I AM MOTHER AND BITCHEST THAT SPEND MONEY COME TO ME BECAUSE I AM A HIGHEND QUALITY AND NOT A CHINATOWN IMITATION. I’ll entertain you thinking that you’re better than me, I’ll let you be, but I know that you’re a motherfucking trend… you’re a 15 second moment, I am the Andy Warhol of hair and you, you are just the Valerie Solanos—you are nothing, you didn’t make anything but the shit between the ridges or my addidas.... and I don’t even wear addidas. Try it with a bitch less than me… and fucking humble your bum ass down…

So now that all the clients that went to you, hate you, they don’t like you—they’re coming back to me—I’m going to teach you what humility is, and every single return tells me “oh he was super nice, so I didn’t want to tell him that my hair was yellow”

You think you’re the bomb? You wanna snub my clients in my face? I pull him to my clients and I show him how to do hair my way…I have a 91.87% retention rate… no one is paying 400-500$ for bullshit… and Ben was very stand-offish… so cool keep charging 200$ and my clients don’t want you.... I don’t even talk to my clients, and they feel like they are getting a bargain…

Humble your dumb ass…I have a 4.5 million dollar apartment, a 2.5 million dollar business and a husband who is obsessed with me worth more than my business and apartment, by far… I never searched for it.

Don’t think cause I’m quiet and silly that I don’t know what I’m doing… I’m the baddest bitch, learn something.