Argh... in 2018

Let’s preface this with only argh because tonight will be the first night I sleep at my house since Wednesday night.

It was a good week. On Thursday I made plans to go hangout with James. I just expected to go over and hangout til like 10 and then head home because he had work. I had come home and made brownies and fed all the animals and headed over. Not long after I got there he told me he was planning on calling out of work and asked if I could stay. So I did…

We went to subway and got sandwiches, which he again paid for. As we’re ordering I tell the chick that I want extra pickles and he’s all extra pickles what are you pregnant and I’m like I can pretty much guarantee I’m not and he’s like good you’d be taking a trip down the stairs. Now I know this sounds horrible, but he said it in an obviously joking manner and I told him it was kinda fucked up and so did the girl behind the counter but we were laughing. Anyways, we went back and watched Ghostbusters and curled up and went to sleep.

Let me tell you… the next morning I woke up before my alarm went off and felt more awake and refreshed than I have in at least a year. So I went by my house and took care of animals and grabbed a shower and headed to work.

So I could have left at noon on Friday but I chose not to. I wanted to wish the 2nd shift guys a Merry Christmas and I wanted to talk to F.

It took forever to get F alone but eventually I managed. We talked. I explained that I hadn’t been just avoiding him the past 2 weeks, but after our last conversation I realized there wasn’t an end game and then I decided I should pursue James. He took it better than expected and kept hugging me and apologized if he had led me on because he didn’t mean to. We ended up kissing for a minute and had our last hookup. I told him I’d probably always love him, but I want more than he’s capable of giving. So then of course he hasn’t texted me in the past couple weeks but then texts me to make sure I got home ok that afternoon and has been intermittently texting since.

I ended up at James’s house Friday night. It was later by the time I got there and we pretty much crashed. I stayed until around 1045 the next morning then headed home to deal with animals and spent about 5 hours cleaning up. Then I headed back to his place. We went to Walmart so he could do some shopping and gamestop and then a Mexican restaurant. He let me pay for dinner this time at least. Then we headed back and curled up in bed again. I stayed til maybe 1130 today before heading home. I really didn’t want to leave.

We had the conversation where we said we weren’t really going to label things just yet, but I told him as far as work guys are concerned I’m calling him my bf now. He said he was fine with that. But then boys are dumb because today he told me that relationships can’t be based solely on sex. And I’m like yeah if it was like that I’d just fuck you then leave. So I guess it’s a relationship? Lol

Other weird thing… so on Friday morning as I was getting ready to leave, James said he wanted coffee and I commented that I used to manage a coffee shop and he said so did he. So I ask him where he was at because you know there’s only a million coffee shops around. Turns out we had worked for the same owner who had the only 2 franchises of a certain coffee shop in the area, but worked at different locations but during the same time period. So we probably talked on the phone any back when but just never knew it. Is that not just weird?