Snaps were sent. No more contact. Turns out she was with her sister this weekend and is actually sick. Her mental illness I think is making her sick. I know I shouldn’t be checking up on her. I’m not strong enough to walk away completely I guess. Maybe its also that I’m not ready to? Mixed in with the fact that I know I have feelings for her still. Fuck. My feelings are weird now.
I’m feeling the way I did when I was trying to get with this person named HC. HC and me used to have a thing but they didn’t want to continue a romance because of the distance. They lived in Seattle. They ended up with a nice guy named JP.
Anyway, point is, I feel for MJ the way I do about HC. I love them but I can’t have nor pursue a romantic relationship with them so its… sitting still.
Does that make sense at all?
I love MJ but my feelings are at a stand still. They don’t change. Its difficult to deal with…
I hate feeling things so intensely. It sucks ass.
In other news, I have to do all my writing and art now on my phone cause my laptop’s power button died. Just my damn luck.
A friend of mine says he will fix it for some beer so I told him sure. In the process of getting a new power button.
I think its dinner time soon. I hope so. I haven’t eaten well lately.
Loading comments...