Serpents In The Garden in The Truth (As I Know It)

I am a damaged, broken man. I have been cowardly and weak much of my life. I have failed to take sufficient responsibility for myself. I have lacked proper self-vigilance, and as a result I have not tended to my garden and it has become overrun by serpents. I have blamed depression and anxiety; I have blamed my parents; I have blamed other people and “society”; I have blamed the bad breaks that came my way while young. I have been immature in the face of the inevitable suffering that is part of being human. I am an angry and resentful man for all of these reasons and more. The choice is simple. Either stand up straight like a responsible adult and begin the arduous task of ridding my garden of the serpents that have overrun it, or do nothing and let them consume me. I need to be accountable to myself. I need to tell myself the TRUTH. Both good and bad.
I call the collective serpents in my garden “The Cocksucker”- because ‘he” is just that. He is malevolent and insidious and fills my head with negative thoughts and emotions, just like a 1000 snakes slithering thru my mind. I think I fight him, but more often than not, I use him as an excuse to be angry and seethe- and do nothing to better myself. The Cocksucker feeds on apathy and inaction. His serpents are drawn to my weakness and coil themselves around my reservoirs of hopefulness and strength tighter and tighter until all I can see is the black void that lies deep within us all.
Honesty is the light in that darkness- the light that sends the serpents scurrying for cover and forces The Cocksucker back into the shadows. It’s time to quit bullshitting myself and everyone else and speak the TRUTH as I know it. I have been a weak and cowardly man, but there is still time to change…