Positives & Negatives in Struggles with Addiction & Depression

Unquestionably experiencing some side effects tonight for the first time after I started on the antidepressants. I knew there would be some changes in my overall experience of things and I’ve welcomed those changes happily.

After work today I was eager to come home and work on an old broken laptop I had laying uselessly in my apartment and I finally managed after many increasingly desperate attempts to get a light Linux OS to properly install.

Now I have the quiet, functional writing station that sits apart from my glowing, high powered gaming laptop which sounds like a hovering jet whenever it runs and can’t really be enjoyed without headphones and loud music.

I never would have done any of it if not for the boundless, productive energy I find myself saddled with. I was always ignoring my obligations for gaming but now my steam library can miss me for a while as I plan to spend more time every day at this desk instead, writing as much as I possibly can.

As for the negatives; now it is very late and my mind is still running at high speed. I feel like I should go for a run, except the weather here is still icy cold and unwelcoming. The sensation is almost one of anxiety like the onset of a panic attack that won’t come. But I have a lot of experience with psychedelics and I always believed strongly in the mantra of my gonzo overlord Hunter S.T.; buy the ticket, take the ride.

I can’t wait for our short spring & summer season to arrive so I can skate all the river pathways again.