Now Playing - “Location” - Khalid
So we have a tentative date for us to go visit my family! I’ll be counting down the days. I haven’t seen my family since I got married. Here’s hoping that nothing catastrophic happens before we can get down there… I don’t trust the universe after DH’s accident. My brother will be on spring break, too, so we get to see him! I must remember to buy Snake Oil before we go down there.
Today was uneventful, mostly. I only had to work 3.5 hours to get the moms through homework and showers and stuff. iKid was being a total asshole to Conductor downstairs in their room so he spent most of his afternoon in bed. He has autism and a cold, though, so I dunno if that made it worse or not. He was fine doing homework with me so that was good. Mickey got in trouble for stealing Ocho’s toy and bringing it to school, so he was in bed too. Typical Monday.
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Tomorrow, I gotta drive myself to the psych lady. I have never driven there by myself but DH insists that I’ll be fine. I have to go through the new roundabout though. I don’t think google maps even knows that it’s there yet. No one here knows how to go through it properly, me included. It is supposed to take 25 minutes to get there, but I’m gonna give myself an hour just to be sure. It’s just a pill updose and check in. It’s just about getting there.
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I want to write a little bit more, so I’m gonna do another one of those journal prompts I found.
Who is your hero and why?
My mom always has been and always will be my hero.
She managed to raise three (mostly) well-adjusted children with little to no money and a volatile, alcoholic, abusive husband. She took the brunt of his abuse so we would be alright. I think she even lied a few times to say she was the one that left the door open, or whatever it was that drew his ire at the moment, so that she would get it and not us. I can’t imagine how she must have felt during those darkest days, but she always was kind and gentle to us kids. She also has depression. I’m sure that she had days she didn’t want to get out of bed. I don’t remember any of those days. I remember her asking me how my day was. She never pressured me to be good at something. If I did my best, it was enough. If I said I was sick and needed to stay home, she knew that I really needed a day to relax. (I hardly ever did this.) When I told her I had a crush on a girl, she just said “that’s okay” and gave me a hug because it was in the middle of a sleepover party that I thought was going badly. She brushed, styled, and dyed my hair every time I asked her, even after I was old enough to do it myself. She made sure that, even though we had no money, we had clothes, food (even if it was almost always pasta), and a place to sleep. Even now, she’s in a long distance relationship, chauffeurs my grandma and sister everywhere (when she had/still has almost-crippling driving anxiety), takes care of us, and the pets. She is so strong. So resilient. If I can become half the person that she is, I will be endlessly happy.
xx
ladylexapro
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