December 4th, 2012: Rockport in "Waiting for my Petrichor"

Today I woke up horribly depressed. I woke up yearning for Washington, which ultimately always leaves me in a foul mood for the rest of the day because I'm here, not there and I know I bitch and moan about this a lot but it is the Big Depressing Factor of my life. I am always thinking about where I wish I was in life: Education. Career. Washington. I have the Ferncroft and a husband and a wonderful dog. I went out last night for the Ferncroft outing and I think that is what started my sour mood because I sat there trying to be happy and trying to connect to these people. But I just can't. I love them as co-workers, but I can't get any deeper than that.

Today Jasper's leg seemed to be doing worse than usual and I found myself bawling my eyes out laying on the ground with him thinking about the money I am spending to go to California. The money I am spending to fix my teeth. The money I'm spending on gifts for everyone. And the money I'm not spending on getting his leg fixed. Because it is this giant sum that I can't work into my budget and it is causing him to be in pain on a daily basis and me to be in pain mentally because I want him to just be my happy baby boy!

I had a tiny spark of energy, and I didn't want to get off that floor. I was barely able to get into the shower and now my hair was wet and my face was red and blotchy. I had to turn that spark of energy into a roaring fire or I wouldn't be able to go on with the day. I remembered Rockport. People in the past telling me, You should go to Rockport, you would probably really like it there.

I hit the road and thirty minutes later I found myself in Rockport. I parked my car and asked myself should I turn left or right? I went left. There was a cafe on the corner and I went inside and ordered a hot tea. A few older men where conversing about Greek food.

"Bakla....Bakla something...You know that sugary pastry?" Blank stares.

"Baklava", I stated. And from that moment on I was drawn into their conversation. One of the older men, Gregory, started to ask about me. Basic questions. Where am I from? What's my name? We ended up talking about literature, poetry, journalism, and such. He was very intriguing, and I realized that this is exactly where I needed to be. I felt the spark firing up into a mass of flames. And I was happy. I sat for about an hour conversing and meeting other locals as they passed through the door. "Hello Susan! How are you? This is Natalie, she came here to meet people!" Gregory would exclaim. I smiled and opened up to these people and was thankful to learn about their little town. Gregory offered to give me writing lessons. He felt I needed to steer clear of following my dream of being an English major when I go back to school and if I want to be a writer to take a more technical approach and get into journalism. He dropped a few names of people working for the Gloucester Times and recommended I get into writing articles for them. He gave me his number, told me to call him sometime so we can set up a time to meet back at the cafe to discuss writing and he'd be more than happy to read my work. I left that cafe feeling infinitely fuller. Like I've been so hungry for some time now and finally found that bowl of green curry over steamed rice that I have been craving!

I asked someone for the location of the nearest book store and was on my way to dive into some crispy classics. The entire town was almost magical. It was overcast and every time I passed an alley way I looked out to the ocean. I watched the ducks floating around, the boats tied up for the time being, and the cute houses decorating the not-so-far-away hills. Many shops were closed, and I imagine the place to be crowded during summer time. But I was enjoying the quietness and talking with the few locals wandering around.

After venturing around Bear Skin Neck, I found myself at another cafe and ordered another cup of hot tea. I sat in the corner and listened to people converse. One woman got up from her seat and as she was putting her coat on, this woman at another table said to her, "I just needed to tell you that I think you are absolutely gorgeous! I love your hair, your outfit..you are just too cute!" The woman blushed and thanked her. It was just so nice. I miss nice. A man who worked at this cafe came by to present to me a coupon for a complimentary drink the next time I came by. Well you better bet I will be coming back to this beautiful little town sometime in the near future! I also plan on writing an article about my discovery of Rockport entitled, "Rockport: My Rock". Just maybe I'll send it into Gloucester Times.