tadow in formless

I don’t think I really mentioned here the bullying I got at my old job
I glazed over it
it was really bad
I had a coworker threaten to leave me bleeding on the side of a mountain
I was the but of most of their jokes
they called me nerd and weirdo and would start yelling and honking at me if I did a task too slowly
Not to mention we were supposed to be working 10s and we barely worked 8s
and I talked to management and they did exactly nothing
it wasn’t worth it to me to push it any farther
so I quit
and I miss doing that kind of work
I feel like a failure
I have applied to so many jobs
gotten a couple call backs but no hires
and I feel like that part of me is atrophying
I am restless and numb
I can feel muscles I once had disappearing
and days just dissolve in front of me and
I look in the mirror and wonder if I am the same person

XOXO
pheebs