November 5th, 2012 in "Waiting for my Petrichor"

So lately I have been thinking about "What if I run into Jon again?". I have gotten to the point where I have completely erased him from my life and all I have to do is delete the OD entries about him and boom he never existed. I even thought about the entry I would write entitled "Awkward" if I ever did run into him. Well I was literally just thinking about this yesterday, and laughing about how it would never happen.

And it happens. Tonight at V's.

Fuck. So much for GIRLS night. I mean, I already have a problem with this group of friends I hang out with. Well, mainly when Deanna is there. I love V, she is a sweetheart, but when D is around it is like The D show. I don't know. I don't like the girl. So this girls night involved baking and bringing our own appetizers. It was fun because I have been super into finding cool recipes on Pinterest and trying them out. I found a delicious one made with puffed pastry, something I have never baked with, so I wanted to try it out. I also made some homemade cookie dough and baked some cookies stuffed with strawberries and cream cheese. Around 7 Dave dropped me off at V's and who is there? Only her and Deanna, and everyone else flaked (besides Pam who was on her way). Pam is like 65 and works with us at the Fern. She is literally crazy and complains about everything, but I don't mind her because she cracks me up and parts of her remind me of my grandma. We chatted a bit and shared our appetizers and then who walks in the door? JON. I literally almost spit out my drink. Complete shock. I thought I was seeing things for a second. I refused to look at him. Refused to acknowledge he was there. Mainly because I physically could not do it. I know it looked bad because everyone could feel the obvious tension, but only V Jon and I know why. All I want to know is why the fuck did he think it would be okay to show up to our girls night out? Did V invite him and not tell me about it? I don't know but it was awkward as fuck. I just ignored him and continued the conversation with the girls. I quickly texted Dave to come pick me up. While waiting for him, I was sitting there with Jasper (who came along to meet everyone), and suddenly the topic changes to voting. How it is our "civic duty" blahblahblah, I'm sorry but I don't believe in voting. I always say, if voting changed anything, it would be illegal. THEY know what is going on before any of us nobodies. If voting actually worked, BUSH would never have been in office. Fuck that shit. Maybe I am just jaded by a fucked up 8 years of that asshole, but this is how I think now and it's what I believe. Of course I SUPPORT Obama and would vote for him if I thought my vote actually counted. The girls were all talking about how ROMNEY and how much they love him, blahblah. I literally just sat there and didn't say a word, trying really hard not to glance over at FuckFace. FINALLY Dave texted me that he was outside and I just stood up and told everyone I was leaving and walked out.

FUCK that shit. Can't believe that just happened to me. I wonder how much shit they were talking about me after I left, but you know what... I really don't fucking care. I miss my real friends. I miss the people I met in Washington. Fuck this fake ass bullshit. This will be the -last- "girls" night I attend. Ugh.