julyxiii in idea barrages

1.) LinkedIn was just a scam by the resume-editing industry to make you feel bad about your resume.

2.) Yes, “Watchmen” predicted America and Russia unifying after a horrific fraud but our ending seems to be a lot darker.

3.) Count Von Count is actually an Archduke, he just doesn’t wanna mess up his gimmick.

4.) facenbrokenze: the tiny heartbreak of noticing a cute friend-of-a-friend on facebook then seeing her 2 last names so she’s clearly married.

5.) The Utah Wrestling Federation’s longest standing champion was, of course, Bam Bam Bigamy.

6.) If a baseball player in Fort Worth retires, do they give him a Texas Ranger Walker as a joke gift?

7.) Film school was like taking a buncha money management classes in case you hit the lottery. It WILL help but only if you’re very very lucky.

8.) I like to think “Yoda” was just his last name everyone called him out of respect but really he was like “Steven Yoda”.

9.) Voice actors seem to be the left-handed relief pitchers of acting. Fascinating borderline-crazy awesome weirdos.

10.) It’s okay that I have a crush on the lady in the CVS poster because she has a few grays at her temple. My crush is sad but it is not creepy.