Fast forward in The ugly truth about making babies

Oh my goodness. Everything is moving forward at super speed now. We had our info session yesterday, got given a billion consent forms and all the info about meds and self injection and side effects. It was A LOT of information to get in just over an hour.

I feel like quite often when I talk to my patients and give them info they look at me with blank faces and I wonder if they’re processing or if they haven’t understood a word I’m saying - I feel like that’s the look I’ve permanently had on my face since our initial appointment in February. I understand it all, I’m fine with it all, it’s just a lot of info to process!

Also had my amh blood test done, for ovarian reserve. They use it to decide on meds dosage. Every time they take any test from me it makes me slightly anxious as to what the result might be. Everything looked good in there as far as the HSG showed, but I always have that little what if I have low ovarian reserve? My eggs won’t be good quality, there may not be enough etc. I’m hoping cos I’m only 32 it’ll be fine, and everything has been good so far. I just don’t want to have got to this point and for something to throw us off schedule.

I went for my meeting with the specialist nurse today for my weigh in, which went fine. I think she was quite impressed, she said I’d done well, which to be fair what else was she gonna say but it still gave me a little thrill!

So now our forms can be signed for funding which is another hurdle crossed. I’m taking this weekend off to celebrate getting this far, then back to it on Monday. I haven’t forgotten my own personal goal to drop another 10kg, and I’d like to have another 5kg off in the next 8 weeks if I can, before we go away. It gives me wiggle room to enjoy myself and not scrutinise everything I eat while I’m away.

Also, I had to ask the spec nurse to clarify this today, we will have another meeting with our consultant before we go away, she said they’re just in the process of scheduling them, which is proving a bit tricky as the consultant’s timetable is changing slightly in the next couple of weeks. We’ll see him within the next 6 weeks and could essentially start treatment at that appointment, or on day 21 of my cycle so whenever that fits relating to that appointment.

I told her we’re away the first two weeks in august so we’d like to start treatment after that and she said she thinks it’s a good idea, and a nice idea to have our holiday to just relax and be together before this all starts which is pretty much what we were thinking. So basically we can start as soon as we get back, and providing things stay on track for a 32 day cycle, which weirdly they didn’t last month and I was 9 days late, then we’ll be due to start down reg meds the day we come home. Not quite sure how that will work but I should have a better idea of when day 21 will be in that cycle before we go and can arrange to see them to get that sorted.

I can’t believe it’s been this straightforward and happened so quickly and easily, even taking the having to lose weight into account. Which baffles me slightly as I was easily the smallest of the 4 women in the room yesterday so I’m not sure what’s going on with that given that I’m just within the threshold now. There was a couple next to us who looked like doctors, who may well be paying privately but the others not so much. Who knows. I’m just glad we’re ok to progress.

We haven’t been referred to Liverpool as we first thought, we’ve actually been referred to Chester. Which is fine, our consultant does clinics at our local hospital and retrieval/storage/transfer at Chester. It’s quite reassuring to know we’ll be seeing him actually rather than someone new, he’s a funny guy but straight to the point which I like very much. No nonsense and I feel like he’d be honest rather than dance about the point, and has his patients best interest at heart. He said if he feels we need to abandon the cycle at any point he’ll tell us before collection so we don’t miss a chance, it basically doesn’t count if we don’t make it to collection. Also, if we have say 8 embryos and freeze 6 from the first collection, further attempts at implantation only counts as the first cycle so you actually get a fair few opportunities which again is reassuring.

Just have to keep everything crossed now that it actually works, we get good eggs, the low sperm count at least produces some good quality sperm, and we get some little embabies that want to stick about. All being well, if things work, we could be in an established pregnancy by Christmas. Of course I’ve thought about what could go wrong, I wouldn’t be myself if I hadn’t thought the worst, but I feel like I have to go into this with positivity or what’s the point.

Xx