Untitled in The Rant Dump

I lost the key to the apartment yesterday. It taught me that I am bad with coping with stress. …or, actually, I’m not sure if I am. I was really exhausted from yesterday’s errands, and that took a toll on me psychologically. I had to excuse myself so I can go outside and punch the wall a couple of times to get my bearings back.

At 8pm, I couldn’t take it anymore and decided to call Joseph. Quite stressed out. Had to talk about something different. Needed a distraction, a good reset. The call made me feel better. But that fixed nothing.

Fast forward to today. I have work in the afternoon so I have time to look for the key in the morning. My efforts yielded no results. The key has a DO NOT DUPLICATE phrase written on it, and the apartment manager has already given us the last copy of it. I made my research and turns out that it doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s illegal to have it duplicated. But of course, people wouldn’t normally know that and they will be defensive about the idea.

One way to deal with this now is to have my aunt hang the key at a designated secret spot. But nobody knows that my father and I do that. It could actually be grounds for us to get kicked out; risking the safety of the house like that. I should gather the mental strength to ask her about it in a good way.

Otherwise, I’ll have to call in sick at work, which I would rather not do. I have just started out around 2 months ago, and still want to give a good impression.

I didnt’ get to laze around during my last two days off from work. Didn’t get to do my laundry either. Kind of an unfortunate week. I’m alive, not doing that well, but still. This problem keeps nagging me. I don’t see an immediate patch up. I’m bad at coping with problems that I can’t solve. I ended up praying today.

I decided to write because it usually puts things into perspective for me, and that it calms me down. Well.... I still kind of feel the same. I’m just procrastinating at this point. I am enjoying the feedback my mechanical keyboard makes while I type. It really is kinda loud. It’s a Cherry brown switch with O-ring dampeners. I like the noise and the way it feels against my fingertips.

Okay I’m just prolonging this entry so I can have an excuse to keep typing. Alright, I should rest up and gather my thoughts quietly.