thinking it through. in a restless heart.

i decided to sit and think about this year, what i’ve accomplished, what i’ve seen and done, how i’ve changed. it’s hard to take the time to just sit and think. i get so easily distracted. as i write this it’s taken me two days to write this much and i’m getting up now to get water and will probably find several other distractions as i go.

[some time later.]

just kidding, i actually only got water and sat back down. go me.

this year has been hard and rewarding. i have learned so much about myself, my friendships, my physical, emotional, mental, and sexual being, and been reminded of the strings that bind family together. i have experienced the happiest and lowest moments in my life.

//january 2016

i was living on the high of completing my first semester of nursing classes while embracing the exuberance of being an aunt. bnh [niece] has brought me a joy that has grown in magnitude each day. pushing myself to get out of bed for school each morning is grueling, exhausting, and tiring in a way that i have never known. learning to take care of the sick, expand compassion for the needy, and practice patience for the impatient is a level of learning i never anticipated being so draining yet rewarding. i also was able to do a sip and splatter event with my aunt!

//february 2016

i have been “not dating” the same guy for a little over 2 years. though not dating, i find myself with him many of the holidays that have occurred during them. if my memory serves me well, we enjoyed thai food and watched terrible horror flicks (solid D list movies) … something we both enjoy immensely. we also enjoy ridiculous anime and gaming, so i guess we are just besties, though his cock is amazingly delightful.

//march 2016

march was pretty low key. i was in full school mode and trying to manage finding the balance of studying, class, clinical, work, family [that adorable niece of mine], friends, and life’s many unexpected moments.

//april 2016

i tried to invest time where i was able. i was able to enjoy a wine festival with my aunt in april. it was a much needed day filled with great wine. i found my favorite wine! Poorhouse aside from that, school really is all i eat, sleep, and breathe. lol. my mom started keeping my niece a few times a week, so the highlight for many months was getting home in time to see her, which was usually rare.

//may 2016

i am not a hospital nurse; i have known that wasn’t a place i saw myself for a while, so when may came to an end, it also meant my clinical/practicum came to an end for the semester. we enjoyed a great lunch. i will say this was the semester i feel like i gained the most knowledge as a student. my clinical/practicum nursing instructor was incredible. i was also able to go kayaking for the first time with a longtime friend, ang. that was the best new experiece of 2016. i was also part of the class of 2016 pinning ceremony; i was able to have a role during the ceremony and dream big on being where they were a year later.

//june 2016

as if school wasn’t hard enough, i had the joy of doing summer nursing classes as well. OB/Peds was an overwhelming nightmare. it was intense, fast paced, overwhelming, and well, a nightmare. lol. it pushed me to my limits and taught me that i’m stronger than i thought and able of taking on more than i anticipated. it was brutal. and on top of it all, I SURVIVED it with two effing A’s. take that and shove it, nursing school.

//july 2016

hello 35. i was elected as a class representative in fall of 2015, so this month i organized some fundraisers to put into action, so we could help offset our graduation expenses. we finished up our summer session at the end of july, and that was reason enough to enjoy a couple weeks before starting the fall.

//august 2016

a rushing force of being a second year came in like a wrecking ball. i started a peer-to-peer mentoring program, and that took up a fair amount of time kick-starting it. it seems to be going relatively well so far, so that’s a plus. getting to know new professors was rough. you get used to teaching and testing styles, so it was a month of brain fog and anxiety.

//september 2016

mom and i took a trip to maryland, and that was the best! her best friend got remarried, and we were happy to go spend time with her and her family and new husband! it was a great adventure. hopefully 2017 will bring a trip or two back to visit!

//october 2016

the past has brought some very rocky years with one of my sister-in-laws, but thankfully this year healed a lot of that. we have been able to hang out together more, and that means i’ve seen more of my brother. that’s been really nice. this month we celebrated halloween together, and i enjoyed that. we get a lot of trick-or-treaters in our neighborhood. in other news, i almost died at the state fair. happy times; memorable times.

//november 2016

so begins the holidays. i realized this year i have so much to be thankful for, and made sure that i enjoyed the time with family and friends. november brought the end of another semester of clinical. and i participated in the great american smokeout with my classmates. we were involved with a PSA as well since our campus is going tobacco free in 2017.

//december 2016

blessed holidays. i did handmade christmas and ended up sewing a lot of presents for friends and family. i was happy to be surrounded by loved ones. i spent several weeks making cookies, candies, and handmade items, and i found myself really into it. lol. i had friends over for a handmade crafting day, and that was a blast. i had finals mid-december, so that made me so thankful for having a sense of freedom for christmas. and here we are.

[end 2016]

Last updated January 02, 2017