4:30 PM
I know I haven’t written in a little while, truth is I just never felt like it. I have been feeling pretty lazy lately and every time I even thought about it, my mind pushed the thought away. Lately I have been playing Fifa 16 and Payday 2 a lot, sometimes I play with my Australian friend and starting next Monday it will be harder to play with him because he has school and the large time difference between us :( . I don’t know if I wrote it in my diary or not but my Seroquel got doubled to 600 mg I have just been taking it later at night so I can stay up longer. The sleep schedule I am on now with me staying up is messing up my body’s natural order because throughout the day I get super tired and require a small nap like yesterday between 6-8 PM and today between 1-3:30 PM, I usually have dreams during these small periods so that means I go into a deep sleep for a short period of time.
So my ex best friend called me today, he apologized and took me out to lunch. Truth be told, despite being so hurt I forgave him early on because I understand how he has to work long hours and the stress required. I had thoughts of being satisfied with no friendship close to me except for those who know me online but the loneliness has been eating at me to the core. We went to the mall and ate Chinese, I offered to pay because I still owe him one but he said he would to make up for when he was such an asshole, we talked about movies going on at the movie theater and then we walked to the Halloween store in the mall to look around, I showed him where I got my gladiator/spartan costume and we looked at a bunch of cool stuff before he took me home. He has a car now-well an SUV I should say, it is a 2006 Chevy but I don’t know the name of the car itself. It is white and very nice, high mileage though but it was easy for me to get in and out of. I guess today I am feeling rather good now that I have my one friend back. I honestly don’t have any other friends, I mean I got old friends from school on facebook but I never talk to them, never hang out with them and the only contact I do with them is when I want weed.
He did figure out that I was using a 2nd facebook profile, I asked him what his first thought was and he laughed because the name I choose is so very close to my given name only slightly different. I understand that our relationship at times can get quite strained and this hasn’t been the first time that we fought and broke off our friendship but I always go back because I know he is the one friend I truly have.
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