So, I finally went to my GP with a literal written list of ongoings. Increasing anxiety, classic depression symptoms, suspected PTSD from 12 years in an abusive relationship, one child suspected on ASD spectrum, other child self harming… etc etc etc..
My GP’s first suggestion was that I check into hospital for three weeks of intense CBT. I think that’s a pretty serious ‘first option’ and have only told Ian about this suggestion so far. I said no can do, my kids need me. I mean.. their dad doesn’t even shower them when they stay with him. The week I was in hospital they came home gross =(
Anywho.. next option is a very, very, very good Psychologist and consults with a Psychiatrist. On my first appointment with the former.. I started with my illness, then my past relationships, then my worries for my kids, particularly the self harm. THEN the childhood trauma, THEEEEN…
Well, by now the guy was reeling in his chair like “Holy fuck, there’s MORE?”
He said “You walked in here.. and you seemed very… calm”
Yes.. I do very well at just keep on keeping on. Just keep going. Just do what needs to be done.
We end up running out of time before I had listed all the stuff that happened/is happening in my life which is causing me issues. I think it’s safe to assume I should be way more fucked up than I am.
That’s all I have to say for now.
-SP
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