I used to hate letting people in…
I didn’t want anything to do with anyone if it meant that we could potentially become friends. I didn’t want them to know me…I didn’t want to know them.
Why?
When I get attached it’s like a death to me when our lives take a different turn and we can’t stay connected. I literally go thru the stages of grief even though - I know - all it takes is a message, a call or a visit. That’s just it. The street goes both ways. That’s when I get into my own headspace and think - if they wanted to stay in touch they could and would. Maybe they don’t?
I’ve grown out of it though. I have become a person that gives you 100% of me in the moment. I still miss you when you are not as talkative or that you don’t visit. I have found a way within myself that it doesn’t hurt as bad because I go all in during the times we spent.
Moments mean more to me now than the fear of the long-term running out.
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