I have been doing this same survey since 2014, but since I jumped journals I don’t have the full archive anymore.
2022
2023
2024
What did you do in 2025 that you’d never done before?
Worked at my current location, doing this job. Built a greenhouse (partially).
Did you keep your new years’ resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
Oh heeeelllllll no. I so completely fucked up my resolutions that I’m going to save that for its own entry. I like doing resolutions, but this year really shows how much I did not make an effort to follow through.
Did anyone close to you give birth?
No
Did anyone close to you die?
My Great Aunt.
What countries did you visit?
I did a lot of dreaming about travel this year.
What would you like to have in 2026 that you lacked in 2025?
An exit from the rat race. Win the lottery. Bail my friends out of their rat races.
More realistically, M’s improved health and mental health. My continued or even improved health. A more confident and dedicated spiritual practice.
What date from 2025 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
June 25, the day I started my new job. Because I was distraught and inconsolable for MONTHS over the change.
What was your biggest achievement of the year?
I feel like I’m actually getting a hang on my overall health. I wrote this before I spent the last few days puking because of a new medication. Granted the medication genre was a step in the right direction, it just isn’t this specific one I guess.
What was your biggest failure?
While I don’t know if this is a real failure per se, the massive backslide that happened after I got moved to my new work location really feels like a failure of sorts. I thought I was stable. But clearly the “adjustment disorder” I was diagnosed with a few years ago is still in effect. It has taken me almost 6 months to feel remotely ok with my new location.
Did you suffer illness or injury?
I got a cold in November.
What was the best thing you bought?
I am so stoked about the Witches of Scotland tartan kilt I have pre-ordered. It was stupidly expensive, but it will be something not commonly seen, especially in a place full of Scots and kilt wearers in general. Kilts are mostly for formal occasions but this is going to be a regular in my wardrobe, it’s not like a traditional kilt.
Whose behaviour merited celebration?
I’m having a hard time with this one, people were pretty disappointing this year. But I think Mandy deserves some credit for how she’s really changed her own life. She went back to school and got a great job, her stupid husband left her and she’s suddenly free of this albatross around her neck. It’s been nice getting to help her and see her through such a drastic change. She should be very proud of herself. I should tell her that.
Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed?
More depressed than appalled, though it’s really bumping up against appalled… but, M. He’s talked about “that guy”, or his “Mr. Hyde”, and that guy has been pretty prevalent this year. M almost lost his license after talking about road rage to his psychiatrist. We’ve had a few conversations about how my anger goes inward and his goes outward.
He asked me to write him a note he could tape to his steering wheel to remind him to stay calm in traffic. I wrote, “I need you to come home”. I can’t imagine him actually hurting anyone, but his description of these moments are so disturbing I do not recognise M in them. I’m just holding on for dear life that he gets real help before the unthinkable happens.
This really hurts to re-read.
And then there’s Red… After the no-support thing regarding M’s kidney stone hospitalisation and surgery I really feel like there is a wedge between Red and I. Like… I can be friendly with her but I’m not sure I’m going to trust her with realness. M is going through too much, I need people who can say “I’m sorry, that’s so hard” and not “Yeah I’m maxxed out too”. I’m actually floored that someone who has been inner circle (she’s my life wife for fucks sake) could be so cold. I got better support from the people I talk to at a distance than the people at home.
I’m trying to let this go but clearly it is still eating at me.
Where did most of your money go?
Probably groceries. Or the power bill. This year I upped my contributions to my RRSP, and my TFSA contributions, so I know 25% of my income went there.
What did you get really, really, really excited about?
I got to take Bastet to bed for my birthday, that was pretty exciting.
What song will always remind you of 2025?
Driving with Bastet through the country side on a greenhouse tour, she showed me this song and it blew my mind. It felt how Hozier’s Take Me To Church felt way back then. Deep and meaningful and so full of powerful emotions.
Compared to this time last year, are you:
Happier or sadder: Happier for sure. This time last year I told my psychologist that I didn’t have a plan for suicide but “it felt inevitable”. Thank god I don’t feel like that now.
Older or wiser: Both. It’s been a tough year. Again. I’m full up on tough years. I’d like another year like 2019.
Thinner or fatter: ** OMG THINNER. Getting a PCOS dx and getting put on meds for that has definitely contributed. I’m finally in a place where I’m not constantly thinking about what I’m going to eat next.
Richer or poorer: ** Hella richer. That 13% raise we got has done wonders for my income. Plus I saved 25% of my income this year, so I feel pretty damn good about finances right now.
What do you wish you’d done more of?
Connecting with people. Socialisation has continued to require more energy than it used to. Though I can’t complain. I got to see The Bird Guy and The Odd Couple in person.
What do you wish you’d done less of?
Getting mad about my posting and letting it eat at me until it ruined my vacation and innumerable weekends.
Also, shopping online. OMG I need to stop.
How did you spend Christmas?
M and I slept in, had a lazy morning. We watched Elf while we ate cheese and crackers and grapes and clementines and I got a rare Cosmos lap nap, which kept me locked in place for a few hours, which was lovely. I napped. He napped.
Then M started the turkey (in a bacon suit), I prepped the potatoes, and made box stuffing and packet gravy (using the turkey drippings of course) and some peas. We ate the Yule Log that I made for the Solstice for dessert.
I’m pretty sure this was one of the nights I threw up. Or maybe I just felt nauseous, but either way it ruined my enjoyment of the turkey dinner.
We watched Klaus before heading upstairs to bang.
How did you spend New Year’s Eve?
Quietly reading (or in my case writing) together until we went upstairs to Fuck In The New Year.
Did you fall in love in 2025?
Normally I can find some aspect of life that I fell in love with… I don’t think that’s the case this year. Life with M has been hard. Red has been wrapped up in her own misery so support has been lacking there.
It’s been a tough year on the people I love.
How many one-night stands?
This is shorthand for threesomes in my world. I got to spend TWO nights with Bastet over my birthday weekend. That was the best present.
What was your favourite TV program?
My immediate thought was Resident Alien.
Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
Still no.
What was the best book you read?
It’s by no means fine literature, but A Court of Silver Flames by Sarah J. Maas. I didn’t expect to like this book as much as I did, considering I thought the character was annoying in the previous books. Maas really breaks down how a person’s trauma eats away at them, causing them to act contrary to their values/feelings. But it also shows resilience, strength of character, and hell yeah, some good old eroticism.
What was your greatest musical discovery?
Not so much a discovery but I’m glad Lizzo is back.
What did you want and get?
When I saw the Witches of Scotland tartan get released I immediately knew I wanted an object with it on. When they released some items for pre-order I was immediately struck by the kilts, but dissuaded by the price. Then we got a 13% raise, and I could not have clicked BUY NOW faster haha.
What did you want and not get?
To win the lottery. My efforts to play the lottery have slowed. But it is still the thing I wish for the most in life. I make myself feel better about such a shallow wish by dreaming of handing out millions to my friends and bailing them out of their own rat races. So far on the list are My sister, The Odd Couple, Bird Guy, CK, Red, Mandy… I need at least 16 million to achieve this goal.
See how not joking about this I am? I feel insane. It’s like believing in Santa Claus.
What was your favourite film(s) of this year?
Well I didn’t keep track of the movies we watched this year. I only rated 3. So I guess according to IMDB (my external brain for all things movie), my favourite movie this year was Nosferatu (2025) (9/10 stars). Which I know is not true, but fucked if I could remember any other one. I’m still thinking this was the year I saw Brothers (2024) because that’s the movie I keep thinking of.
What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
As previously mentioned Bastet came to visit. She arrived and cooked this elaborate meal and then we took her to bed. The next day we went out to run some errands, which somehow took the entire day, and got back in time for an absolute rager. JK. It was a bunch of 40-somethings playing Beer Pong, Battle Shots and then drunk Cards Against Humanity for a couple hours. We had more people at the table than we had chairs in the house.
Eventually everyone left except Bastet and we took her to bed again.
It was an excellent birthday.
What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
I immediately want to say “staying at the training school and not having my entire world upended”. But Maybe not. Maybe that path was going to be worse than the one I was put on.
So I will say, M finding a treatment and preferably cure for his neuralgia. Which I know a cure is not a thing, but a girl can dream. If he could get rid of just a few of his chronic pains maybe That Guy wouldn’t be such a problem.
How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2025?
Burgeoning. I’ve bought a bunch of new clothes that I feel like will make me feel more me-like. I’ve started wearing them. But I still feel a bit like I’m playing dress up. And I mean that’s fun to an extent, but I want to feel confident in what I wear.
What kept you sane?
Actual medication.
Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Keanu Reeves keeps popping up in unexpected places. I really like him. I especially like that the rumours about him are positive. That he’s a thoughtful generous guy. We need more role models like him.
What political issue stirred you the most?
I don’t want to talk about it.
Who did you miss?
M quite a lot. Red. The Odd Lady. J4. My sister.
Who was the best new person/people you met?
My supervisor seems pretty rad.
Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2025:
If you keep doing the thing, eventually it gets easier.
Quote that sums up your year:
“Those who don’t believe in magic will never find it.”
— Roald Dahl
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