s7 in idea barrages

How can you be a pirate if you’re in the Mohawk Valley where there is but one slender river fused with a canal? Don’t worry, baby, you can’t spell “Nautical” without “Utica”.

Missionaries are always thrown off by how promptly but politely I reject them. “Do you want to go to church with us next Sunday?” “Nope!” I reply cheerfully, “But you guys have a great night!” It blindsides them that I’m not down for it but I’m nice about it.

My favourite Tacomon is definitely Baja Blastoise.

Car photography is highly dependent on auto-focus.

Why say “dairy farm” when you can say “creamatorium”?

Everything is intentional, especially the things you didn’t intend.

Why say “closet organization” when you can say “hanger management”?

A plastic surgeon with the slogan “Get Youthenized By Us!”