aug 16 in idea barrages

Why say “flat bottom boys” when you can say “assless chaps”?

I don’t call the Syracuse hockey rink “the Oncenter” not only because its real name is The Onondaga War Memorial but also because its too easily confused with the villain of The Lorax, The Onceler.

Your assistant texts you from their Starbucks stop: “I’m sorry, I’m running a little latte”.

Cthonic The Hedgegod.

Toothpaste commercials say “plaque bacteria” a million times but never portmanteau the word “plaqteria”.

Would Mary’s sister have been the Auntie Christ?

If you make your grilled cheese with Kraft Cheesesque slices, that’s technically hot Singles in your area.

Step 1: get some merchandise of Anaheim’s baseball team. Step 2: add tons of googly eyes. Step 3: Biblically-Accurate Angels.