It was explained to me that I am going to run my coordinator out of a job.
He wasn’t in again today to answer questions that topside had about our program. He wouldn’t have been able to answer a lot of them because they were my projects. His manager told me that I am going to run him out of a job. He then explained that they considered asking us to switch job roles. This is something my coordinator has said in passing, rhetorically, I explained. Long story short, it is up to my boss but it is not out of the realm of possibilities that I end up the coordinator of my program.
We broke the ice, so to speak. My coordinator and me. I am not as tongue tied so I will be able to communicate my grievances tomorrow. There is a brotherly love between us. It was awful the way things were last week. I was tongue tied and couldn’t bring myself to speak to him. Which was awkward so I wasn’t able to look at him either. It was keeping him up at night. I know it was. I wasn’t trying to punish him with that cheap manipulative power move. I’m just a poor communicator sometimes. He poured his heart out to me about it on Saturday, but made an assumption about why I was upset. He got it wrong, I need to correct him.
He thinks I’m upset because our workloads are so disproportionate. I have my days but then I remember who I am doing it for, but my issue is him abandoning program. He is ditching the kids. I was already offered a promotion and chose the team. He isn’t choosing the team. I feel like I am going to end up with his job, one way or another. I would rather him not lose his job.
Anyway, I have been spending a lot of time in the sun the last few days. Just soaking it in while I can. The days are getting shorter, that thought makes me desperate. I went to the beach alone yesterday. Went for a bike ride with my roommate there first. She went home after that and I wanted to lay in the sun. Today I went to a park to sunbathe with my bestie. We have a playdate in two weeks with her kids and my niece and nephew. I can’t wait to take my niece and nephew to the little town up North that I adored as a kid. It hasn’t been taken over yet by Canada’s public enemy yet.
I’m just tossing and tortured so I figured I vent a bit.
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